Showing posts with label hope. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hope. Show all posts

Thursday, February 9, 2023

Light in the Darkness

It was just after midnight when my brother got the call from the hospital. My mom came in the room, and when she saw him on the phone at that hour of the night, she knew it couldn't be a good sign. A few minutes later, he turned the phone over to her and came and got me. My worst fears were confirmed when we got into the kitchen and he said, "Dad just died."

The hospital wondered if we would like to come see him before they moved him to the morgue. I knew I needed to go. Once my mom was done talking to them, we gathered in a hug, the three of us huddled together in grief. We got dressed and went to the hospital. One of the nurses met us at the door and escorted us up, as it was after visiting hours. He looked much more peaceful than he had a few hours previous when I had talked to him and said my good byes (but in the hopes I would be able to come back the following day to talk more, and hoping and praying he would recover against all odds). A charity had donated quilts to the hospital for patients on comfort care, which the family got to keep. We gathered around his bed. It was an important part in saying good bye, but I hadn't expected it to be so soon! He went so quickly. We took his belongings and the quilt home. The quilt is now on our couch. We would get to see him once more, a few days later at the funeral home.

The jar
(My painting Le mont Rainier is in the background.
As it was December, we had our nativity scenes up.)

As friends and family heard the news, people started sending flowers. I got a big bouquet from my team at work. It meant a lot. But the most meaningful gift for me came from my friends Kim and Jason Kotecki. I have mentioned them on my blog in the past. Jason is a masterful artist who has done many amazing paintings. One of his recent paintings is called Hope in the Darkness. It has a mason jar on the grass with fireflies inside and flying upward out of the jar. There are trees at night in the background. It is dark, but the light from the fireflies indicate hope, bright lights flying through the air and providing their own light where there isn't much. (My blanket has that painting on it as well.)

Hope in the Darkness
Jason Kotecki, 2020
Used with permission

I picked up the box from them at our door and wondered if I had ordered something from them and had forgotten about it. It was heavier than I expected. When I opened the box, I found a mason jar with rocks in it. I was confused at first, but after a bit of examination realized what it was. It had semitransparent blue river rocks with fairy lights wrapped around the rocks inside the jar. It also has an on/off switch and a battery compartment. It harkens back to his painting.

The flowers we received were very meaningful, but that jar lamp meant more to me than I can express. I use it all the time before going to bed. In a way, it's almost like my dad is there with me, shining a light into the room. I miss him.

But their kindness didn't stop there. Kim and Jason's oldest daughter Lucy makes amazing winter hats. I ordered some at an excellent price, and she outdid herself. Jason's dad Walt (a cancer survivor and an amazing person) offered to talk by phone and be a comfort. All of that meant the world to me.

Kim recently lost her dad. I pray for their family's comfort and encourage anyone who feels so inclined to join me. I'm so thankful she got to spend time in the hospital with her dad before the end. We've had so much grief and loss in the past few years. COVID, international conflicts, earthquakes, tornadoes, hurricanes, shootings, cancer, and so much more. We all need comfort and love. The world needs more families like the Koteckis, who make an effort to reach out and offer a prayer, a hug, an ear to listen, creativity, immense talent, and so much more. Kim likes to talk about chosen family, who are not related by blood, but are as good as family. They are part of my chosen family.

There is always hope in the darkness. Even in the darkest night, there are always glimmers of light and hope if we know where to look. The Koteckis remind me to be the light for someone who needs it.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

"Fred Phelps, why do you persecute Me?"

"Persecution"
© May 29, 2013 Steven Sauke
All Rights Reserved

As many people know, Fred Phelps is the pastor of Westboro Baptist Church, which is famous for protesting funerals of soldiers and other events, purportedly warning people of God's wrath and hatred because of homosexuality and various other issues that they oppose.

God, on the other hand, has a decidedly different opinion on the matter. As the apostle Peter put it in 2 Peter 3:9, "The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise [to return and judge the world], as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."

Westboro's vitriolic and hateful actions have recently reminded me of another apostle, originally named Saul. Later in life, he told Timothy, "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life" (1 Timothy 1:15-16).

What great sin did Saul commit to call himself the worst of sinners? He started out as a Pharisee, a member of a religious sect that was devoted to keeping the Law of Moses to such an extent that they added a bunch of laws to it, and actively sought to root out anyone that broke said laws. When Jesus came to fulfill the Law, they were instrumental in putting Him to death because they felt He spoke blasphemy. After Jesus' death, resurrection, and subsequent ascension into heaven, Saul went berserk trying to get rid of Jesus' followers. He oversaw the stoning of Stephen, which made him instrumental in the first recorded Christian martyrdom. However, as he was on the road to Damascus to spread his bigotry and murderous rampage...

Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” 
“Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked. 
“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.” 
The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone. Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything.  
In Damascus there was a disciple named Ananias. The Lord called to him in a vision, “Ananias!”  
“Yes, Lord,” he answered. 
The Lord told him, “Go to the house of Judas on Straight Street and ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul, for he is praying. In a vision he has seen a man named Ananias come and place his hands on him to restore his sight.”  
“Lord,” Ananias answered, “I have heard many reports about this man and all the harm he has done to your holy people in Jerusalem. And he has come here with authority from the chief priests to arrest all who call on your name.”  
But the Lord said to Ananias, “Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.”  
Then Ananias went to the house and entered it. Placing his hands on Saul, he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord—Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here—has sent me so that you may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” Immediately, something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes, and he could see again. He got up and was baptized, and after taking some food, he regained his strength.  
Acts 9: 1-19

Saul went on to become Paul, and God used him powerfully to spread the gospel throughout the greater Mediterranean region, possibly even reaching as far as Spain. Paul's life was turned around while he was on the warpath of bigotry.

It occurs to me that if there was hope for Paul, who was not only yelling hateful slogans, but actively trying to bring the subjects of his wrath to "justice" (see: execution), there is hope for Fred Phelps and his band of people in need of a savior. Both Saul and Phelps honestly thought that they were serving God by spreading their hatred, and both were wrong. Saul did a 180 and turned his life around, repenting of his sin and dedicating the rest of his life to making a positive difference in the world. Will Westboro? I hope and pray they do before it's too late and they find themselves standing before God's throne of judgment, only to find that what they thought was a service to God was in fact counterproductive and sinful. If they don't repent, I fear they will hear God tell them, "Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me" (Matthew 25:41-43).