Showing posts with label car. Show all posts
Showing posts with label car. Show all posts

Thursday, February 8, 2024

Pardon Me, Sir

The commercials are classic. A car pulls alongside another, in which a man is sitting in the backseat with an fancy sandwich on a plate, with elegant silverware and the works, laid out on a seatback table. The gentleman is spreading Dijon mustard (which he just pulled out a special compartment in the car just for Dijon storage) on his sandwich. In a (usually) British accent, the man in the first car says, "Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?" The man who is eating graciously says, "But of course!" He may or may not hand it to the man who requested it.

I recently found the following poem in my papers. I handwrote it at some point, but did not date it, so I don't know when it was written. I was trying to sound British, but in retrospect, I may have been trying a little too hard. All the same, I hope people find it entertaining. Perhaps it will inspire you to share your Dijon mustard. Also remember, "It's one of life's finer pleasures."

It is best read in a British accent.

Photo by Prostock-studio on Adobe Stock


Pardon me, sir
Pardon me
Could I make just one little request?
Pardon me, sir
Pardon me
Could you tell me, full of zest?
Would—
Oh dear, the traffic light is green!

How I crave it!
Oh to taste it!
My stomach's set
I need it yet!
I hope that gentleman has a bit!

Pardon me, sir
Pardon me
Could you grant one small request?
Pardon me, sir
Pardon me
Of this I do not jest
Would you—
Oh, the traffic light is green!

Oh I crave it!
Oh to taste it!
My tummy's set
I need it yet!
I sincerely hope he won't waste it!

Pardon me, sir
Pardon me
I would like to make a request
Pardon me, sir
Pardon me
If you could tell me, with some zest
Would you have any Grey Poupon?

But of course you do!
But of course!
I thank you, kind sir!
I thank you so very much!
You make me jolly!

Pardon me, sir
Pardon me...

Monday, March 13, 2023

Days of Yore: Transportation

Once upon a time, a young child with ADHD (who didn't know at the time that he had ADHD) was sitting in the car looking out the window singing, "Old McDonald had a - FORD!"

Yep. Some kids interrupt themselves to yell, "Squirrel!" I interrupted myself when I saw a billboard advertising Ford cars, as well as any time I saw an airplane or helicopter in the sky. (Certain birds, such as eagles and robins, as well as cows and llamas, have also elicited such a reaction out of me on occasion.) I got very excited about any cars, and I'm told I could identify the make and model of a car from a long way away. I often cut pictures of cars out of magazines to put in scrapbooks. I had a relatively large collection of matchbox cars. When I visited my great grandma when I was little, my favorite part of her apartment was the closet where she kept her toys, which included cars. After her memorial in 1983, our family went to her place to split up her belongings. I made a beeline to her toy box and claimed the toy cars. As I got older, I collected models and other representations of Philippine jeepneys. My dad and I liked to assemble models of cars, planes and other vehicles. I also loved playing with Transformers, which were usually toy cars, trucks or planes that converted into robots.

Jeepney in Cebu, Philippines
Photo by Øyvind Holmstad
CC BY-SA 4.0 license

The Philippines had several different kinds of transportation.

  • Jeepneys were adapted from World War 2 jeeps. The picture above is an example of one. They were elongated, and behind the driver's seat, there are two benches going from front to back on either side. It's a common form of public transportation, and people often crowded them. Riders would bang on the ceiling when they wanted to get off. Generally, jeepneys are privately owned, and the owners take pride in decorating them in bright, artistic colors. They often list the destinations where they go on the sides.
  • Our mission agency had a Toyota Tamaraw. A tamaraw (the animal) is similar to a water buffalo (carabao), but smaller and wilder, and the horns are a bit different. They live on the island of Mindoro, Philippines. The automotive version was very similar to a jeepney in setup, but with aspects of a van. They had plastic on the windows that rolled up, so on nice days they could be rolled up and open to the air, and rolled down and secured on rainy days. (I think newer models have changed since we lived there, but that's how they were at the time.)
  • Tricycles were common in neighborhoods. They involved a motorcycle with a sidecar. Sometimes the sidecar was decorated, and it sometimes had a roof. People often decorate their tricycles similarly to the way they decorate their jeepneys. The sidecar generally has a capacity of one or two people, but that didn't stop people from crowding more onto them on occasion. In Thailand, they had a similar vehicle called a tuk-tuk, which is kind of like a cross between a motorcycle, rickshaw and golf cart. Both tricycles and tuk-tuks have three wheels, counting the motorcycle.
  • Since the Philippines is an archipelago, they traveled between islands using planes and boats.
  • Bangkas are rowboats with wide pontoons going out on either side. They are common for taking people out on the water, going between smaller islands, snorkeling and fishing. 
  • Glass-bottom boats are particularly common around the coral reefs. There are benches around the perimeter, and the middle has a glass bottom, so riders can look down and see the awesome beauty of the colorful reefs, coral and fish, among other sea life. They often had a place in the back where you could jump off to go snorkeling.
  • Calesas were common in the older districts in Manila. They are the Philippine version of horse-drawn carriages, with massive wheels on either side, and decorated similarly to jeepneys and tricycles. (Since the Philippines doesn't get snow, the annual Nutcracker ballet used calesas instead of sleighs. There were a lot of other things they did with the set, props and costumes to make it more relatable to Filipinos, while leaving the music and ballet itself intact.)
  • They also had transportation more normal to the average American, such as cars and buses, as well as airplanes and helicopters.

Airplanes have changed a lot over the years. The changes that immediately come to mind are that they no longer have phones on the backs of the seats in first class, and the meals they serve (if they serve any at all) have gotten a lot smaller. I've noticed in recent years, they sometimes charge for meals separately from the price of taking the plane. If I remember right, meals used to be included in airfare. Also, planes often have in-flight wifi now. They sometimes had a screen in the front of the cabin to watch movies, and you would plug headphones into the armrests in the seats to listen. Then they started having screens in the seat backs and the ceilings. Now many planes no longer have screens, but have options for watching on your phone or device after logging into their network on wifi. Devices generally need to be turned off or put in airplane mode during ascent and descent, though.

I took the train in Thailand, as well as in different parts of the US. I also took the train from London to Paris (part of the journey under the English Channel) and back. Trains have changed during my lifetime, but as my train experience has been much more limited than other forms of transportation, I haven't had as much chance to observe those changes. 

While Seattle doesn't have a subway, I have taken the subways in Paris, London ("Mind the gap!") and New York. I've also taken the El (elevated train) in Chicago. Seattle does have a monorail, and the extensive light rail system is under construction. The completed parts of it are in use.

Cars have done away with the ashtrays that used to be standard. They have also gotten a lot smaller, on the whole. 8-track players in cars gave way to cassette players, which were replaced by CD players. Now many cars don't even have those any more, but there is usually an option for playing streaming radio, such as SiriusXM. Now you can roll the window down in the car by pressing a button, and the driver usually has the option of locking the windows. When I was younger, there was a crank on each door to roll the window down. That crank liked to get stuck sometimes, and good luck rolling the window up when it's rainy if the crank is stuck! It sometimes took a lot of muscle to roll the window up and down. When I was little, I thought cars with seatbelts in the back were cool. Most only had them in the front, if they were even there. In cars with seatbelts in the back, we often had to go digging under the seat for them because they had a tendency of retreating into the inner recesses of the car. Now they are standard in all cars, and required wearing by law. When I was younger, I loved riding in the back of pickups, and it was especially fun riding in the trunk of my grandparents' station wagon. Now that isn't legal any more, so it's been years since we've done that.

I got a car for my 18th birthday. I remember telling my French teacher about it. It was a yellow Dodge Viper. She was impressed until I pulled it out of my pocket and showed it to her. It was a matchbox.

When I was 15, a lot of my friends started taking driver's ed. In Washington State, you can get your learner's permit at 15½. I was a bit wary at first because I had slow reflexes when I was younger, and was worried that would cause issues. Also, when playing Pac-Man, I kept missing corners and could just see myself driving a car and overshooting an intersection. (Thankfully, I have since learned that isn't how cars work!) So I waited a few years before getting my driver's license. Even after getting my license, it was several years before I got my own car. I drove the family car when I needed to, and occasionally borrowed one. Seattle has a great transit system, so I generally commuted to work on the bus.

As long as I can remember, I have always named our (real) car. My first car was Astrid. My dad helped me to find a place that sold used cars, and Astrid had been a rental before being retired from that status. She was beautiful. Being single and not having kids, she was like my child. It was heartbreaking losing her in an accident in 2019 (see the poem I wrote in the link in this paragraph). I waited a couple months to get a new car, due to injuries from the accident, but once I was cleared to drive again by the doctor, I went looking for a new car. A friend recommended CarGurus.com, and I found the perfect car at a nearby dealer. I was able to haggle the price down a bit, and he is an amazing car. I named him Luke. Though he has less trunk space than Astrid, I feel he was an upgrade on the whole.

At this point, I'm sure you're wondering how I drive with my cell phone. The simple answer is, I don't! I know, it may be a bit shocking that there are things I don't do with my phone (such as drinking coffee), but driving and texting or holding a phone is illegal in this area, and my phone does not magically transform into a car, or a robot for that matter. (Don't tell Optimus Prime or Bumblebee. I'm sure they'd be disappointed.) That said, I have been known to check bus schedules and New York subway schedules on my phone. The OneBusAway app is great for bus schedules. Google is also great. I have also used my phone to order plane and train tickets and request rides on taxis, as well as Uber and Lyft.

Saturday, February 11, 2023

Good Samaritan in the Big Sky State

Montana, early 1970s. A young elementary teacher taught at one school in the morning and another in the afternoon. That day, she was driving through the countryside on the icy roads, from one school to the other. She was on a schedule and had to get to class on time. So it was a bit alarming when the tire blew! She was young and had never changed a tire before. This was in the days before cell phones, so her options were limited out there in the middle of nowhere, in the cold.

Having pulled off the road, she set about trying to figure out what to do. She had to get to class, so needed to figure something out quickly!

Then it happened.

Another car approached, and pulled off the road. The driver, a stranger, got out and approached the stranded woman. She doesn't remember if they even talked, but he volunteered to change her tire. Once he was done, he drove off, and she never saw him again.


Photo by Vlad
Adobe Stock


That young teacher made it to class, grateful for the kindness of a complete stranger who happened to be at the right place at the right time. She wondered if he was an angel.

This teacher is still young today, but somewhat less young than she was approximately 50 years ago. I know her very well; in fact, she has taught me a lot of what I know. She and her husband would go on to have two sons later in that decade. They named their second son Steven.

Tuesday, December 3, 2019

Lament for Astrid


Astrid, my beautiful Astrid
From the first test drive, I was in love! 
Your shining silver coat
Your wonderful gas mileage
You were always there
I could always depend on you
To get me where I was going

My pride and joy
My own beloved car
I couldn't ask for a greater automotive child 
You were my own
I loved you so
We went through so much together
My sweet, strong car

On that final ill-fated trip
You got us far
You worked so well
And when disaster struck
Divine strength guided us
Between the trees
Glancing off, not hitting head on
Coming to rest
Airbags deployed
Injured, but alive. 

Beloved Astrid,
You saved our lives
But lost your own

I thank God
For His Divine Strength
His Astrid that He gave me
Five years I will never forget
Five years with my first car
Dependable to a fault

Now, my beautiful car,
Your time is done. 
Rest in peace.