The Rise of French Musicals

I wrote this paper in college based on research on French musicals. Note: Les Parapluies de Cherbourg (1964) predates La Révolution Française (1973), but I was unable to find much information on it at the time. The paper stated that La Révolution Française was France's first musical. I have corrected that detail for the purposes of this blog. I have made a few other small tweaks, but that is the most important one. I have also added a few comments in [square brackets], mostly to clarify facts that were current in 2000, but may or may not still be current.

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THE RISE OF FRENCH MUSICALS

by Steven Sauke

February 24, 2000

For 134 years, America has had musicals. Great Britain has had them for a much shorter time, but in both nations,  particularly on Broadway and London's West End, they have become immensely popular. Relatively recently, another nation has entered the realm of writing musicals. This paper will discuss the rise of musicals in France, starting from the early heritage long before the musical, as we know it today, was invented, and coming up to the present, as the most recent French musical has possibly started to change the formerly negative views of the French toward the art form.

In the 17th Century, Molière wrote his plays, which had an influence on today's musicals. He started writing plays which required more talent than in the past. He used satire. For example, certain of his characters were easily recognizable as specific real people. More importantly, he put music in his plays. In all but one play, he worked with composer Jean-Baptiste Lully to make a musical play. In such plays as The Bores (1661), Monsieur de Pourgeaugnac (1669) and Le Bourgeois Gentilhomme (1670), they used the harpsichord as the principal instrument (Flinn 44) with 5-string instruments, bassoons, flutes and oboes (Flinn 45).

In the early 19th Century, composers in Italy started to incorporate speaking lines in their operas, thus creating a new genre of opera, called opera buffa in Italian. This kind of opera soon became quite popular in Paris, where it became known as opéra bouffe or opéra comique. Donizetti's The Daughter of the Regiment was particularly popular in Paris in 1840. Many composers started writing "light" (one-act) operas, and the operetta was born (Citron 33). The first was Jacques Offenbach's Orphée aux Enfers (Orpheus in the Underworld). As Stephen Citron states in his book The Musical from the Inside Out, "Gone were the tragic arias and the high drama; they were replaced by shorter, wittier, less florid songs. Lively dance, (in this particular work, the famous can-can) displaced arty ballet" (33). In 1858, a government-sanctioned limit of one act and two roles on operas was lifted, and the operas and operettas got longer (Flinn 59-60).

The composer Hervé wrote musical plays to perform as therapy for the inmates of the Hôpital Bicêtre. He was so well received that he was appointed conductor at the Théâtre du Palais Royal, and he soon began to write longer plays. During that same time period, his colleague Offenbach wrote his first two-act musical play Orphée aux Enfers, which we have already mentioned. It became immensely popular in Paris. He worked with Henri Meilhac and Ludovic Halévy, who Denny Flinn calls in his book Musical! A Grand Tour "the first legitimate librettists" (61). In the past, the composer had written the lyrics as well, but that was now done by Meilhac and Halévy. They wrote "solos, duets, trios, quartets, chorus scenes, and dances" (Flinn 61). In his 25 years of composing, Offenbach wrote over 90 operettas, many of which had a political focus.

With the end of Offenbach's composing years came a new rising star in the composing field. Charles Lecocq started writing romantic operetta, and soon the Parisians decided they liked amour better than politics and satire in their operetta (Flinn 61).

Opera and operetta continued with Wagner's record 16-hour Der Ring des Nibelungen, written between 1853 and 1874 in Germany (Flinn 66) and Gilbert and Sullivan's numerous operetta, among them H.M.S. Pinafore, The Mikado and The Pirates of Penzance, written in England approximately between 1875 and 1896 (Flinn 67-77). Some of Gilbert and Sullivan's operetta were performed in the United States, and soon a new genre was born: the musical.

In 1866, a melodrama by the name of The Black Crook was performed in the US, and it was received poorly. A new idea came about. Maybe if they were to add music and dancing, it would be more popular. Groseppi Operti arranged the music, wrote some of it, and collected the rest from music stores. They arranged dances and planned a big spectacle (Flinn 81-82). Now all they needed was dancers. Enter the French. Yes, the French were involved in America's first musical. A troupe of Parisian ballerinas were on board a ship for the US to perform a ballet at New York's Academy of Music. Unfortunately for them, the theater burned down while they were on the ship, and when they arrived, they had no place to perform. However, this fire and the displaced French troupe turned out to be fortunate for the people who were working on The Black Crook. It now had dancers, and the French dancers had The Black Crook, a chance to show off their footwork for the Américains (Citron 38). The 5½ hour musical was a hit (Flinn 82). Sure, the Church blasted it (rightly so, in my opinion) because of nudity or near nudity, but the United States had succeeded in inventing a new kind of play. Thus was born the musical (Flinn 84). More musicals followed, the next popular one being Show Boat in 1926 (Flinn 175).

For several decades, the US was the only nation who was doing musicals, until Great Britain started to follow suit in the 60s with such musicals as Oliver! by Lionel Bart and the original version of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat by Andrew Lloyd Webber.

The 70s brought the rock operas, a new kind of musical. In England, Andrew Lloyd Webber wrote his popular musical Jesus Christ Superstar, while in France, two men by the names of Alain Boublil and Claude-Michel Schönberg composed their first musical, a rock opera: La Révolution Française.

La Révolution Française

Boublil and Schönberg's first work was also one of France's first musicals, and it was quite popular in France. It was the story of the revolutionary young Charles Gauthier and his growing love for Isabelle de Montmorency, a member of an aristocratic family during the turbulent French Revolution. Gauthier fights alongside Robespierre, Danton and Marat, and all the while he is growing fonder and fonder of Isabelle. Isabelle's family is banished from France because they are aristocrats, and the lovers are thus separated. Charlotte Corday's assassination of Marat starts the Terror, in which the Revolutionary Tribunal sentences hundreds of innocent people, including Queen Marie Antoinette, to the guillotine. Among those sentenced is Charles Gauthier. Isabelle returns from exile to find her lover in prison, and she is also condemned to death because she, an aristocrat, returned (Taylor).

La Révolution Française, "the first-ever staged French rock opera in Paris (Les Misérables CD-ROM), brought Boublil and Schönberg together as composers, and it was a big hit in France. Such was the beginning of a new age of musicals in France, though it continued to be slow in taking hold.

Starmania/Tycoon

La Révolution Française came out in 1973, and six years later came another rock opera, this time by Luc Plamondon and Michel Berger. They called it Starmania. It too was quite popular, and the composers, Plamondon in particular, have been making changes to it ever since it came out in 1979. New versions came out in 1986 and 1988. It premiered in Moscow in 1990, and the English version, translated by Tim Rice and renamed Tycoon, came out in 1992. In 1993, a newer French version of Starmania came out in Paris (A. Lee). Some songs from it have been recorded by such artists as Celine Dion (Starmania). Certain songs from it became quite popular in the 1980s, such that Tim Rice commented that it was "a hit show in a city infamous as a graveyard for musicals." We shall see more of this side of Paris' ideas of musicals later.

Starmania's plot goes like this: Monopolis, a futuristic city, is being terrorized by the underground group Les Étoiles Noires (The Black Stars), led by Johnny Rockfort, who is led by Sadia, a revolutionary student. They meet in the Underground Café, where Marie-Jeanne is a waitress.

A man named Zero Janvier is running for president of the Occident, and he is against the Étoiles Noires.

Sadia and Johnny Rockfort are in love, and Marie-Jeanne falls in love with Ziggy, a celebrity hunk. Cristal, a reporter on the TV program Starmania, interviews Johnny Rockfort and Zero Janvier, and she falls in love with both men, though much more so with Janvier. Janvier, meanwhile, gets engaged to a movie star named Stella Spotlight, while Rockfort and Cristal fall more in love with each other.

Cristal and Rockfort make plans to plant a bomb at the disco parlor where Janvier and Spotlight are planning to get married, but Sadia gets wind of the plan and tells Janvier. Ziggy abandons Marie-Jeanne in favor of acting and being a disco DJ. The followers of Janvier, on Sadia's warning, arrest Rockfort and kill Cristal. Janvier is elected president (Il se passe..., L'histoiremania, Valentine).

Both La Révolution Française and Starmania, though vastly different in setting and story line, were about love, and both were tragedies. These two musicals seemed to set a precedent for musicals to come, a precedent that came from French literature and opera from time immemorial. So much of France's literature and art is based around love and tragedies. For that matter, French is stereotypically known as the "language of love," and Paris is often called the City of Lovers. It only fits that France's musicals would follow that pattern.

Starmania opened in Paris in 1979, and the next year, another musical, Boublil and Schönberg's second, opened, also in Paris. This musical was to become their greatest success until then, and quite possibly their greatest success even today, but not in Paris.

Les Misérables

Les Misérables is a very complex musical, whose plot spans about thirty years. Set in the early to mid 19th Century, it is the story of an extraordinarily strong thief named Jean Valjean who escapes parole and turns his life around, becoming the mayor of a small French town. When the policeman Javert sees Mayor Madeleine (the name Valjean has taken to protect his identity) lift a heavy cart, he is reminded of Valjean, who he believes has just been caught. After Javert tells Madeleine about the recent arrest, the latter proves to the court that he, not the accused, is Valjean.

Meanwhile, a woman named Fantine has been working in Madeleine's factory to support herself and her illegitimate daughter Cosette, who lives at an inn where she, unbeknownst to Fantine, is being abused miserably. When Fantine's coworkers discover she has an illegitimate child, she is fired and forced onto the street, where she sells her locket and her hair, and in desperation, falls into prostitution. When she scuffles with a potential customer, she is arrested by Javert and rescued by Madeleine, who takes her to the hospital, where he promises that he will raise her child. As soon as she dies, Javert arrives to arrest the mayor, who he now knows is Valjean. The latter escapes to the inn of the Thénardier family, where Cosette lives, to pick up the girl.

Nine years later, Cosette is a young woman who is falling in love with the revolutionary Marius. When Thénardier, Cosette's one-time abuser, attempts to rob Valjean's house, Valjean assumes that Javert has found where he is hiding, and he resolves to move, which would separate the two lovers, as his daughter must go with him.

Marius and his student friends are growing more and more angry with the plight of les misérables, Paris' oppressed poor, and they break into fighting. Valjean is given the chance to kill Javert, but instead, he lets him go. In the process of the battles on the barricade, all of Marius' friends are killed, and he is seriously wounded. Valjean carries him home to Cosette. Meanwhile, Javert, thoroughly bewildered by Valjean letting him go, commits suicide. After Marius rehabilitates, he marries Cosette, but their happiness is interrupted by the impending death of Jean Valjean, now an old man (Choi).

Following the pattern of its predecessors, Les Misérables is a tragedy about love. Valjean's love for his daughter leads him to save the life of her beloved, and their romance is rewarded by a marriage. However, the heroes on the barricade, Marius' friends, are killed near the end, and at the very end, Valjean is dying.

Les Misérables began Boublil and Schönberg's collaboration with British producer Cameron Mackintosh, who has produced the English versions of their more recent musicals as well. It opened on London's West End in English in 1985, and it soon opened on Broadway. At present, it has been performed in fifteen languages in twenty-three countries, and it is Broadway's second longest running musical (R. Lee). Though it has been phenomenally popular around the world, I have found little evidence of strong popularity in France itself. I have seen the Original French Concept Album around, and in France, I saw that there was a recording of the current French version. It sold 250,000 tickets in Paris in the space of seven months (Brambilla). Beyond that, I have seen no mention of any popularity in France. Perhaps that is why Tim Rice called Paris "a city infamous as a graveyard for musicals." One thing I do know is that Boublil and Schönberg moved to London, because, as Boublil stated, "France is still back in the old operetta tradition of the 1930s" (Citron 17).

Miss Saigon

In 1989, Boublil and Schönberg came out with another musical, which was again a big hit in London and on Broadway. Like previous French musicals, Miss Saigon is a romantic tragedy, and like Boublil and Schönberg's previous musicals, the lovers are forced to part due to circumstances beyond their control. Also like their previous musicals, it is set during a time of war. This musical is set in the former French protectorate of Vietnam in the mid to late 1970s. Miss Saigon is the story of a Vietnamese teenager named Kim who is orphaned in attack on her village in the countryside in 1975. She must come to the big city of Saigon, where she falls in love with an American Marine named Christopher Scott. They go through a Vietnamese wedding, and he plans to take her home with him. Meanwhile, Saigon falls, and the Americans are evacuated. Chris and Kim are separated, and neither can get to the other. Chris is forced to board the last helicopter out (which they actually manage to get on the stage).

Kim waits three years for Chris to return for her, during which time she bears a son who she names Tam. Chris, meanwhile, thinking he will never see Kim again and having no idea that he has a son, marries an American woman named Ellen. When Chris' friend John discovers that Chris and Kim have a Bui-Doi son (Vietnamese for "the dust of life," the Bui-Doi were children of American soldiers and Vietnamese women conceived during the war), he tells Chris and suggests that Chris and Ellen go to Bangkok, where Kim has fled for her life, to try to resolve this problem. When Kim finds out that her husband has married another woman, from none other than Ellen herself, she is thunderstruck. Ellen refuses her pleas to take Tam to America because Ellen believes that a child belongs with his mother, and, as a last resort to force a better life for her son in America, Kim shoots herself, thus severing all ties of Tam with Vietnam, and Asia in general. She dies in Chris' arms (Story).

Miss Saigon is the longest running show at London's Theatre Royal on Drury Lane, and it has been performed in twelve countries (Dixon). I can only assume that France is one of those countries. It was originally written in French, but I have been unable to locate a French recording or even any lyrics. Even in France, the only recordings of it that I saw were in English. In short, I have found no evidence of popularity in France, thus reinforcing Rice's claim of Paris being "a graveyard for musicals." It qualifies as a French musical because it was written and composed by Frenchmen, and it follows the aforementioned patterns of French musicals.

Martin Guerre

Several years later, Boublil and Schönberg came out with their newest musical to date [as of 2000, when this paper was written]. Martin Guerre is about a 16th Century 14-year-old named Martin from the small village of Artigat, France, who is forced to marry, and when he refuses to consummate his marriage, he gets blamed for a series of storms, and the priest whips him in an attempt to exorcise the demons that are supposedly keeping him from consummation. Feeling he can trust nobody, he flees to fight in the Religious Wars. On the battlefield seven years later, he is seriously wounded, and his friend Arnaud du Thil leaves him for dead and goes to Artigat to tell Bertrande, Martin's wife, of his demise. The people of Artigat mistake him for Martin, and welcome him warmly. Bertrande convinces him to take Martin's name, and he reluctantly agrees, but the townspeople eventually realize that he is not Martin. By this time, Bertrande is expecting a child by Arnaud. Arnaud goes to trial in Toulouse to settle the matter, and as the judge is about to make his ruling, a new witness enters the court: the real Martin Guerre. The judge rules that Arnaud go to prison until Martin decides his fate. When Martin frees his friend, Guillaume, a jealous suitor of Bertrande, murders Arnaud (Martin Guerre).

Martin Guerre has received rave reviews in London, and it is currently nearing the end of its first run in the United States [as of February 2000]. Its Broadway debut has unfortunately been indefinitely postponed due to the lack of a theater. Once again, I have found no sign of popularity in France. I did not even find any English recordings of it in France.

Martin Guerre is, like its predecessors, a romantic tragedy. True to its Boublil and Schönberg predecessors, the hero and heroine are separated due to circumstances beyond their control, as we have seen.

Though Martin Guerre has not, to my knowledge, been very popular in France, the next French musical has blown all of its predecessors out of the water.

Notre-Dame de Paris

"The Americans adore it. The English too. In the Francophone countries, the musical was received without conviction, until... Notre-Dame de Paris!" (Brambilla) Except for Starmania and La Révolution Française, the previous French musicals that really took hold, took hold in England and America, and elsewhere around the world. Not so much in France. It seems that the brand new musical Notre-Dame de Paris is changing all that.

Where all other French musicals have failed, Notre-Dame de Paris has finally succeeded in interesting the French in musicals. Luc Plamondon, of Starmania fame (as well as a couple other musicals which I have not mentioned), teamed up with the Italian-French Richard Cocciante to musicalize Victor Hugo's novel of the same name as the musical (known in the US as The Hunchback of Notre Dame).

As Patricia Brambilla encapsulizes the plot in her article Les clés d'un succès monumental ("The Keys to a Monumental Success"), "The priest Frollo and Quasimodo, the hunchback, love the Gypsy Esmeralda, who burns for the soldier Phoebus. Who is attracted by Esmeralda, but promised to Fleur de Lys..."

Notre-Dame de Paris, set in 15th Century Paris, is about Quasimodo, who grows up in the belltower of Paris' Notre Dame Cathedral (known in French as Notre-Dame de Paris, or Our Lady of Paris), where he becomes the bellringer. The Archdeacon Claude Frollo has raised him from childhood. Frollo is so enamored by the young Gypsy Esmeralda that he stabs Phoebus to keep him from loving her. When Esmeralda is arrested and brought to Notre Dame for supposedly murdering Phoebus, Frollo offers that he will free her if she will consent to him loving her. She is repulsed. Quasimodo helps her escape from prison, but she is caught again and executed by hanging. Quasimodo, furious at Frollo's actions, throws his surrogate father off the balcony of the cathedral and rushes down to the place where his beloved is being hanged, only to arrive too late (Notre Dame...Synopsis). The musical ends with Quasimodo's heartbreaking lament, promising to be buried with her and expressing his desire to see her dance once more (Plamondon & Cocciante Acte II, 9eme Tableau).

True to French form, Notre-Dame de Paris is a romantic tragedy. It has a complex group of people who love the next person, but that person may or may not reciprocate that love. Phoebus (who, incidentally, survives the attack) loves both Esmeralda and his fiancée Fleur-de-Lys. Fleur-de-Lys has nothing but hate for Esmeralda, and she even tells her fiancé that "I'll love you if you swear/That you will hang/[Esmeralda]" (Plamondon & Cocciante Acte II, 5eme Tableau). Frollo loves Esmeralda to the point of lust, but Esmeralda, understandably, hates him very much. In the end, Frollo and Esmeralda are dead, and Quasimodo is about to commit suicide. [In his novel, Victor Hugo points out that Phoebus also came to a sad ending: he got married. That is only implied in the musical, though.]

Notre-Dame de Paris sold 450,000 tickets in one day in Paris. As a matter of comparison, Les Misérables sold 250,000 in the space of seven months (Brambilla). Notre-Dame made its English debut in Las Vegas January 20 of this year [2000], translated by Will Jennings, who wrote the lyrics of "My Heart Will Go On" from the movie Titanic. It is set to open in London in May [2000]. It has broken all records for popularity, and the CD cast recording has been at the top of the charts there. From here, France could do one of two things with musicals. It could do the same thing it did after the successes of La Révolution Française and Starmania; namely, return to being a "graveyard for musicals" (Rice). I think it is more likely, however, that, based on its unprecedented popularity, the other possibility will happen. I think that the 21st Century will see a growing popularity of musicals in France. I said earlier that Boublil and Schönberg moved to London because France was "behind the times" concerning musicals. When I went to see Martin Guerre earlier this month [February 2000], I noticed in the program that Schönberg now once more lives in Paris. I do not know if this return is related to the success of his colleague's musical Notre-Dame de Paris, but I think it may be a sign that France is finally entering the field of musicals, and that they can be popular in France.

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[Author's note, March 17, 2018: In the 18 years since I wrote this paper, musicals have indeed increased exponentially in France, and French Canada has also come out with some. It is gratifying as I retype this essay to see that my prediction that it would grow in popularity was accurate. I wrote a section for this paper on La Légende de Jimmy, about the life of James Dean, which sadly had to be cut because the paper was too long. Shortly after writing this, Roméo & Juliette and Les Dix Commandements came out. Boublil and Schönberg have also written more musicals, including The Pirate Queen and Marguerite. Many more musicals by multiple composers have followed.]

Works Cited and Consulted

Please note, this is as of February 2000. Most URLs likely no longer work due to the amount of time that has passed since then.

• 5th Avenue Presents. "Claude-Michel Schönberg." Martin Guerre: The Official Program of the 5th Avenue Theatre Company. 11.4 (2000):8.
• Boublil, Alain. From Madame Chrysanthemum to Miss Saigon. 10 Feb 2000 <http://miss-saigon.com/origins/madame.html>
• Brambilla, Patricia. Construire. 1999. 31 Jan 2000 <http://www.construire.com/SOMMAIRE/9906/06cult2.htm>
• Choi, Andrew. Synopsis. 1996. 10 Feb 2000 <http://www.geocities.com/Broadway/2403/lmsynopsis.html>
• Citron, Stephen. The Musical from the Inside Out. Chicago: Ivan R. Dee, 1992.
• Dixon, Paul. Miss Saigon. 1998. 10 Feb 2000 <http://www.albemarle-london.com/saigon.html>
• Flinn, Denny Martin. Musical! A Grand Tour. New York: Schirmer, 1997.
• Il se passe quelque chose à Monopolis. 9 Feb 2000 <http://www.multimania/younig/ilsepass.htm>
• Lee, Anthony Patrick. Starmania Historique. 1996. 9 Feb 2000 <http://www.sirius.com/~alee/s/starchro.htm>
• Lee, Rob. The Barricade on the Rue de la Chanvrerie: A Tribute to Les Misérables. 1999. 10 Feb 2000 <http://www.users.cloud9.net/~rlee/lesmis/>
• Martin Guerre. 10 Feb 2000. 2:00 PM. Dir. Conall Morrison. Perf. Hugh Panaro, Stephen R. Buntrock, Erin Dilly, Jose Llana, and John Herrera. 5th Ave Theatre, 1999.
• Les Misérables: The Complete Symphonic Recording. CD-ROM. London: EuroArts, 1997.
• Luc Plamondon. 10 Feb 2000 <http://www.sacd.fr/bio_plamondon.htm>
• Notre Dame de Paris - Synopsis. 1999. 16 Feb 2000. <http://www.geocities.com/Broadway/Stage/9590/Nd_synopsis_uk.html
• Plamondon, Luc, and Richard Cocciante. Notre Dame de Paris. Pantin: Publiphotoffset, 1998.
• Rice, Tim. Tycoon: Version anglaise de Starmania. 1992. 9 Feb 2000 <http://www.sirius.com/~alee/s/startyc.htm>
• Starmania. 1999. 9 Feb 2000. <http://www.canadiantheatre.com/s/starmania.html>
• Starmania: L'histoiremania. 1994. 9 Feb 2000. <http://www.sirius.com/~alee/s/starhist.htm>
• Story. 10 Feb 2000. <http://www.miss-saigon.com/musical/story/>
• Taylor, Steven A. La Revolution Francaise. 1996. 9 Feb 2000 <http://nomad.users.netlink.co.uk/rev.htm>
• Valentine, Roger. Starmania - the plot. 9 Feb 2000 <http://www.geocities.com/Broadway/2446/startext.htm>

Graphics used in this blog:

La Révolution Française: http://www.purepeople.com/media/pochette-du-disque-de-la-comedie_m712697

Starmania: http://starmania.pagesperso-orange.fr/

Les Misérables: http://www.cabotins.ca/les-miserables/

Miss Saigon: http://cardiff.carpediem.cd/events/3032658-miss-saigon-at-wales-millennium-centre/

Martin Guerre: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8tApgUz0xGo

Notre-Dame de Paris: http://2muchponey.com/lifestyle/notre-dame-de-paris-est-de-retour/

Musical Clickbait

I am not a fan of clickbait. Sometimes you have to find humor in these things. Here are a few musicals explained with clickbait...

Expectant mother drinks green potion. What happens next will blow your mind!

Aspiring Knight dreams an impossible dream. You won't believe what he thinks he can fight with a sword and a shaving basin he thinks is a helmet! My countenance is WOEFUL!

BAT CHILD FOUND IN CAVE (Oh wait...)

Barber uses this simple trick to REVOLUTIONIZE the neighboring meat pie business!

He tries to separate his good and evil natures. The result? I'm SHOCKED!!

Starved orphan sold to a funeral home after he asks for more food. You won't believe what happens after he escapes!

She meets him at an earthquake benefit concert. Their romance inspires a nation and disgusts an Argentine-Cuban Marxist revolutionary. See how the money rolls in and out. I'm CRYING for her!

Determined police officer doggedly pursues thief across two decades. What happens when they meet will SHOCK you!

Dragon prepares to bake her famous savory donkey pot pie. I'm TREMBLING! Flattery really does save lives!

[clickbait headline of show]

Voyage ends in tragedy as frozen dihydrogen monoxide sinks ship! AVOID DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE!!!

Dreams come true! Disgraced Egyptian slave saves nation. You won't believe who else he saves!

He secretly slips some acrimonium in her drink. Boy oh boy, that full disclosure is strange!

How far will a younger brother go to ensure that his sister continues to torture him? I'm SHOCKED!!

Bohemian beauty steals the hearts of a hypocritical priest, an engaged archer, and a deaf one-eyed lame bellringer. I'm IN TEARS!!

Bookish oddball falls in love with horned creature. You'll be SHOCKED what happens when she declares her love!

This girl lost her parents and her ayah in a cholera epidemic in India and is being shipped back to Yorkshire to live with her widowed and grieving uncle. Her cousin has been bedridden ALL HIS LIFE and lives in fear of becoming a hunchback. 1 Like = 1 Prayer

Lord Farquaad's heritage called into question. Spread this ABSOLUTELY EVERYWHERE!

Boy under the control of an evil supercomputer uses this simple trick to break out!

He dreamed of soaring like an eagle on the big screen in Bollywood. What happened on the journey home will shock you!

SCANDAL!! Apprentice blames rash of DEATHS on one of the plants in his shop!

New Chairman of the Board credits obscure thrift shop book for his meteoric rise to the top. Mr. President, watch out! See page 5 for the juicy details of his upcoming wedding to his secretary.

Greek wine god takes servant on quest down the River Styx. You'll CROAK when you find out who he meets on the way and who he brings back!

Martha Stewart HATES him! Aspiring playwright pens a culinary musical.

You WON'T BELIEVE where Conrad Birdie is going next, and you'll be SHOCKED about his one last kiss before he leaves! We're CRYING!

OMG, you guys! If there ever was a perfect couple, THIS ONE qualifies!

SCANDAL!! Jilted bathing beauty MURDERS diva!

You won't believe what this hobbit did with his priceless ring!

Gangster threatens to KILL his girlfriend, a bar singer. You WON'T BELIEVE where the police hide her, or what she does to the place!

What this Greek demigod was accused of stealing will literally SHOCK you!

Forbidden love between an Egyptian prince and a Nubian princess, and we just CAN'T EVEN!!

Have you heard? There's a rumor in St. Petersburg!

Diva breaks silence on upstart managers, being cast out of opera, and the unsuitability of her replacement

Exclusive! Who is the real Christine Daaé? Get all the details from opera insider Carlotta Giudicelli! Prepare to be shocked! Does Ms. Daaé owe her so-called talent to a mysterious "Opera Ghost", or is it just her rich lover, the Opera's new patron?

Escape Adulthood Summit 2017

Today has been a very long day, as it was day 1 of the 2017 Escape Adulthood Summit. This is an annual conference hosted and put on by my friends Kim and Jason Kotecki. Jason is an artist and motivational speaker, and he and his wife Kim have a passion for helping others to become more childlike, realize their potential in life, and follow their dreams and passions. There are so many unwritten (and nonexistent) rules that adults often tend to follow, and they tend to hold us back if taken too far. We let fear, hurt and other things stand in the way of following our dreams. What if people don't like what I have to say? What if? What if? Children don't have many of these inhibitions, and we can learn a lot from them on how to live life.

The day started yesterday evening when I caught the airport shuttle, and then a red eye flight out of Seattle bound for Minneapolis. The Minneapolis airport is quite large, so I got quite the workout walking to my connecting flight to Madison, Wisconsin. Upon arrival in Madison, I was picked up by Dan, a new friend who, like me, showed interest in sharing a hotel room. Since I arrived several hours before the summit was set to start, we drove around Madison. I got to see the Wisconsin Capitol building, which is spectacular, and we stopped at the lake, where I got some pictures. We walked out on a dock, and I commented that the dock rocked! Literally!

We then proceeded to the nearby town of Poynette, where the conference is being held. Still early, we drove around the area and saw some buffalos grazing, and we passed a pleasant farm. We then went to the conference location, but they weren't ready to let us in yet, so Kim sent us on an errand to get some whimsical flowers and come back closer to the starting time. We found a nearby country store that advertised selling asparagus and flowers.

Once we explained what we needed, the helpful lady who owned the shop proceeded to arrange a bouquet. Once we had paid for it, they invited us to sit down and chat. Country life is slower and friendlier than I'm used to in Seattle. The lady who helped us was at the table with a couple elderly women, and they asked what we did, and told us a bit about themselves. One of the older women told us about how her husband was a pilot and flew a two-seater aircraft. They flew that plane up and down the coast, around the US, and then proceeded to fly around the world, mainly stopping to refuel and rest. She mentioned stopping in Adelaide, Australia, where they have opal mines. She was wearing an opal ring that they got there. They had a landing strip on their farm in Wisconsin, and after her husband passed away, she donated the plane to Wings of Hope. She feels her husband would have approved. I'm probably not doing the story justice, but it was fascinating, and I appreciated her sharing her story. We were probably at the store for an hour or two, chatting most of the time. By the time we left, it was closer to the starting time.

When we got back to the farm where the conference is held, we had fun playing with bubbles while we waited for the doors to open.

The conference started out with lunch. They had enlisted the services of two food trucks, and there was also lemonade and other drinks. I selected the food truck with tater tots covered in a variety of different toppings. Mine were poutine tots. They were delicious, though Mia, a Canadian fellow attendee, took one look at them and informed me they were not authentic (I asked).

As we entered, there were personalized goody bags on the table by the door, which included everyone's nametag (which is how the bags were labeled) and a bunch of supplies for the summit. There were little Lego people, t-shirts, a small notebook, some of those pens we had when we were little that have something like 15 colors in one pen, and more.

As the talks began, I made a point of writing every line of my notes in a different color. I felt at first this was a fun childlike way of writing notes. As the summit went on, I realized the choice of colors was getting harder, and rather than childlike, it was becoming symptomatic of adultitis, as I started missing things due to the choice of color taking place in my head. Lesson: Trying too hard to be childlike can be a symptom of adultitis.

The theme for this summit was: "EVERY DAY IS AN ADVENTURE"

Jason quoted Helen Keller: "Life is either a grand adventure or nothing." He pointed out that we often don't do something because we're afraid it won't work. Instead, we should ask ourselves, "What if it does work?"

From my notes:

The best adventures follow no maps.
"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious." - Albert Einstein
What is one thing I can do to make this a little better?
Live like someone left the tank open. (This was inspired by an octopus who escaped its tank.)
"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in the bud became more painful than the risk it took to bloom." - Anaïs Nin
"This is not rocket surgery here."

They suggested shouting things like "You rock!" out your window at passersby. We need to hoard memories rather than things. We need to be more ridiculous.

Jason recommended tinker projects, which he has started doing. (He explains that in the link better than I could.)

Instead of saying "Here goes nothing" when trying something out, we should say, "Here goes something!"

For one of our activities, we made ugly cakes. We were given pre-made cakes with frosting and all kinds of random items to put on them. Each table formed a team, and we were to be as creative as possible. Our team's cake was "New York Zombie Apocalypse" (or something to that effect). We ripped the cake into several pieces and built structures on it. There were zombies involved. There was even a zombie penguin. It was pretty impressive, if I do say so myself!

Before dinner, we broke into teams and did improv games with an improv troupe from Wisconsin called Mojo Dojo. They were impressed with our improv chops, and we had a great deal of fun. After dinner, they did a show.

The weather was stormy off and on. At times it was sunny, and at other times, the clouds rolled in, the rain dumped, and they had some seriously epic lightning strikes. I was wishing I was fast enough with a camera to get pictures!

To be continued...

Kathy Griffin's Faux Pas

Thoughts on recent events related to a misguided picture posted this week that went viral...I suggest reading the whole thing before you respond.

All sides have good points.

No matter how much you hate a person, pretending to behead them the way Kathy Griffin did is a horrible, shameful deed, even if you have no intention to actually physically harm them.

A normal citizen who did that would be in prison, but it seems that rich, popular comedians only get their shows cancelled (rightly so).

Barron Trump is 11. Under no circumstances is it OK that he was led to believe, however briefly, that his father was brutally murdered. Nor is it OK for us to criticize Trump for defending his son.

It is just as horrible that Sasha and Malia Obama had to deal with seeing people hang their father in effigy, burn images of him, and otherwise commit the exact crime against Obama that Griffin committed against Trump. Since the Obama effigies didn't go as viral, I don't know if they were fooled as Barron was.

I think this has gotten more press than the Obama effigies because Griffin is higher profile than the Obama effigy-ers, and it looks more realistic.

I think it would help if Barron and Melania move to the White House as soon as possible so Barron will not be so easily fooled, having his father right there.

Kathy Griffin apologized. Many of the people calling for us to forgive her are the same people who call for the heads of people who do similar things to liberals, long after they apologize.

Kathy Griffin only apologized after being pressured to do so. However, I do believe we need to move on, and we do need to allow her some reprieve. It's more than she deserves, but every one of us has made horrible mistakes that we regret. Yes, she needs our forgiveness.

The Trump family has been deeply traumatized by this. Yet they have been called bullies for responding as any family would when threatened by a realistic-looking effigy. Griffin's act was one of the worst examples of bullying I have ever seen in my life. Calling the Trumps bullies for this is victim shaming at its finest. They have done enough actual bullying without criticizing them for their reaction that was probably much calmer than most families faced with this kind of brutal attack.

I have seen reports that Griffin has received death threats. This is even worse than what she did. I find the increase of death threats on social media in recent years to be a deeply disturbing trend that needs to be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. It is never OK to threaten to kill someone, to tell them to commit suicide, or in any other way wish death on them. Even as a joke.

It is never OK to be glad of another person's misfortune. We must not rejoice that the Trumps have been traumatized and scarred, and we must not rejoice that Kathy Griffin lost her job.

Both Trump and Griffin are human. Both have done horrible, grievous things. Both are bullies. We need to hold them to high standards, but we also need to extend grace to both. Those of us who pray need to do so earnestly for both of them.

We must move on and let both sides heal. I was traumatized seeing that picture, and I don't even like Trump. I hope this is a wake up call to everyone that we need to be civil to each other.

False Musical Plots

My craziness has struck again. This time I decided to come up with musicals, using their actual titles, but summarize the plots completely wrong. Enjoy!

Wicked
About a bunch of candles that have just had their wicks installed. They have been wicked.

The Phantom of the Opera
The sad tale of Banquo's ghost in an opera version of the Scottish Play

Titanic
Inspired by Big, but he gets much, MUUUCCHHHH bigger!

Rent
About a rip in time and space... It is rent in twain!

Sister Act
A remake of White Christmas, focusing on the Haynes Sisters

Beauty and the Beast
A mysterious deformed creature haunts an opera house and trains a beautiful diva to sing

A Very Potter Musical
The Brady Bunch learns to make pots

Something Rotten
A musical about cleaning out the fridge at work

Cats
All the actors completely ignore the director, drawing a metaphorical parallel to herding cats

Hamilton
People get ill from eating a ton of ham

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
About a factory that churns out merchandise for the hit band "Charlie and the Chocolate"

Shrek
About a failed attempt at turning Star Trek into a musical. It was named with a mouth full of food. The person tried to say "Star Trek", but it came out all garbled.

The Buddy Holly Story
Two holly bushes become best friends

Once on This Island
Captain Jack Sparrow remembers the last time he was left marooned on this island. There was more rum at the time.

Elf
An elf moves to the Shire and revolutionizes the hobbits' gardens, songs and culture

Pippin
The Lord of the Rings from Peregrin Took's perspective

Young Frankenstein
A teenager learns honesty while drinking from a stein

Miss Saigon
Someone moves across the world from Vietnam and feels homesick. They really miss Saigon!

Aladdin
A boy is stuck in something, but what is the lad in? You don't find out until the end.

Urinetown
Where you are once you get downtown: you're in town.

Evita
A Spanish musical about avoidance

Sunset Boulevard
A musical about a road that is stuck in a time loop at sunset

Mamma Mia!
Super Mario Bros, the Musical!

The Drowsy Chaperone
An elementary field trip goes wrong when the overworked and underpaid parent who comes along falls asleep

Spamalot
The ultimate war against junk mail. Canned meat gets thrown across the stage.

The Civil War
A polite disagreement among gentlemen

Man of La Mancha
A Spanish man applies to Starbucks and specializes in making macchiatos​. (Mancha and macchiato literally mean "stain" in Spanish and Italian, respectively.)

The Wizard of Oz
After an exemplary career at Hogwarts, the potions master retires to sell potions by the ounce.

Ragtime
That time of the day when things get so dirty that simple tissues won't do.

Into the Woods
A sequel of Legally Blonde, where the main character is a huge fan of Elle Woods

Camelot
Set in the desert, where there are lots and lots of camels

My Fair Lady
The sad tale of Sansa Stark and her ill-fated direwolf

Bat Boy
In an attempt to sound cooler and more menacing, Robin rebrands himself

The King & I
The life and times of Priscilla Presley

State Fair
Iowa is rated as simply fair. Not great, not horrible, just fair.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Josh Groban's dog must be exorcised when he starts biting off people's hair

Hairspray
A mad scientist invents an aerosol can that sprays hair everywhere.

Matilda
The sad tale of an Australian swagman who stole a jumbuck and jumped in a billabong rather than be arrested. It involves a fair amount of waltzing.

The Slipper and the Rose
"Rose Tyler, I - "

Chicago
The entire cast gets blown across the stage by a strong wind

Carousel
Travelers at the airport are constantly losing their baggage because the baggage claim carousel isn't working right

Labyrinth
The third task of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, extended into a full length musical

Oliver!
An amateur gardener calls in the professionals to groom his olive tree

The Scarlet Pimpernel
A star-crossed lover picks the perfect red flower for his beloved girlfriend

Love Never Dies
An appropriately-named musical in which the lovers truly love each other, are utterly faithful to each other, and they both survive. In fact, they are vampires, so they are immortal.

Annie Get Your Gun
Annie must take extreme measures to protect herself from the ongoing threat of Miss Hannigan, Rooster, and their devious schemes to find Easy Street

Mame
About a serial murderer who can't spell right

Annie
All about Annie Oakley and her sharpshooting skills

Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat
A futuristic story of an innovative young lad who invents a coat that can project movies

Hello Dolly!
Dolly keeps missing the painfully obvious. I mean, hello!!

Groundhog Day
Old Ivy finally defeats the Chipmunks, and the mayor declares a holiday to celebrate. J. Pierrepont Finch gives a speech (sung, of course) at the ceremony.

Addams Family
Belle meets her future in-laws

Jersey Boys
A group of football players campaigns to replace their old outdated jerseys

The Falsettos
The show must go on, despite all the sopranos and altos having various unavoidable conflicts to the choral concert. The tenors and basses must cover for them.

Musicals Minus a Letter

One letter can make a big difference! A group I am in challenged us to come up with names of musicals, but take out a letter, and then explain the plot of this new musical. I had fun with this and came up with a bunch. I may be adding more as I think of them.

Lord of the Rigs
A hobbit trucker must take a semi to Mount Doom and destroy it (kind of a "Lord of the Rings meets Mad Max")

The Irate Queen
The Queen is not amused.

Unset Boulevard
An aging and crazed star of yesteryear must now remove the dishes, silverware and napkins that she carefully arranged on the street. Quick before that Cadillac drives over them! It does not end well for the driver of the Cadillac.

Little Hop of Horrors
Crazed bunnies resolve to "eat Cleveland and Des Moines and Peoria and..."

Spiderman: Turn of the Dark
The Dark Side takes a whole new form, turning to new forms of evil.

Vita
The first lady of Argentina celebrates life.

The Pantom of the Opera
An opera singer goes mute and must now mime their part.

The Hunchback of Note Dame
A hunchback gets dating advice and must take notes.

Le Mis
One person is very miserable.

Ear Evan Hansen
Evan gets an ear transplant.

Hailton
In a massive hailstorm, a whole ton of hail falls.

Beauty and the East
A beautiful maiden encounters ugliness and love out east.

Beauty and the Beat
Belle plays the drums.

The Little Mermad
Ariel is not amused.

Newses
Gollum joins the media and brings the newses to all those nasty hobbitses.

Ragtim
Tim has fallen on hard times.

Hell Dolly
Dolly is not amused.

Finding NeverLAN
The epic search for that place where there are no computer networks.

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Tying
You can win or lose, but a tie is not an option.

Ciderella
A rags to riches story of a young maiden who loves apple cider and meets a prince

Gus and Dolls
The theatre cat finds a new hobby in his retirement.

Bye Bye Birde
Everyone says good bye to their favorite bird before it flies south for the winter.

A Yea with Frog and Toad
Frog and Toad win the election.

The Music Ma
A proud mother helps her musical child to greatness.

The Iz
The life story of Israel Kamakawaiwo'ole.

Alexander's Ragtime Ban
A prohibition tale of when dancing was not allowed.

Ida
Mrs. Strauss travels back in time and meets an Egyptian prince. It does not end well for either of them, but "the gods love Titanic."

Into the Wood
Villagers band together to enter a tree.

A Very Otter Musical
Hermione's patronus learns to sing.

He-Man of La Mancha
A very macho man takes on the pesky windmills.

The Black Rook
The epic tale of a chess piece's quest to checkmate the enemy.

Catch Me if Yo Can
A hip hop musical about a rapper's escape from justice.

Mamma Mi
A mother is very excited about the third note on the solfege scale.

Reamgirls
A group of girls finds stardom with the help of reams and reams of paper.

[tile of show]
About someone who lays tile.

[title of sow]
A pig goes from Ma'am to Mrs. to AA to BA to Doctor.

High School Música
A boy and girl meet at a fiesta in Cancún and find out they go to the same school in Oaxaca.

Ten Beach Movie
Like A Tale of Two Cities, but on ten beaches instead.

Little Omen
Starts with an ominous warning and goes on to tell the sinister story of four sisters.

Rankenstein
A mad scientist brings a dead man back to life using spare body parts and electricity, but things go south quickly when the creature's foul, rank odor withers grass, causes trees to fall over, and local animals to keel over dead.

The Fros
Dionysus and his servant Xanthius encounter a sinister group of hippies with frizzy hair while questing to bring back a decent playwright.

Hrek
Gesundheit!

You're a Good Man, Harlie Brown
The Peanuts gang learns to ride motorcycles.

Sow Boat
A boat sails up the Mississippi carrying a load of pigs.

Show Boa
The pigs on aforementioned bot got eaten by a snake.

Spamalt
A new concept introducing a malt shop at the local spa.

The Kin and I
Anna visits her family.

If/Hen
An iffy tale of chickens.

Flower Rum Song
Captain Jack Sparrow had a bit too much to drink.

A Christmas Tory
The family Christmas party gets a little too political.

Big Ish
It's kinda big, but not huge.

10 in the Shade
The dry winter when the Snowmaker visited.

The Secret Arden
About a town in Ontario that very few people know about.

Samalot
About a gallant knight named Sam.

School of RCK
An Algerian soccer team trains its players.

Fiddler on the Roo
A joey learns to play the violin.

Bombay Reams
An aspiring Bollywood star struggles through reams of paperwork to reach his dream.

Ale of Two Cities
London and Paris compete for the best brew.

Wet Side Story
It's raining in New York.

A Christmas Carl
An updated version of the classic tale, in which Carl Scrooge is visited by three hosts.

Airspray
A popular teenage show decides to promote compressed air. Everyone's electronics are cleaned.

Hairspay
A very hairy puppy visits the vet.

Wes Side Story
Wes joins the Jets.

One on this Island
The epic search for palm trees on islands.

Dr. Horrible's Singalong Bog
Dr. Horrible goes on a quest through marshy flea-infested bogs to reach the secret lair of the Evil League of Evil, singing the whole time.

Beauty and the Beast

The animated version of Beauty and the Beast came out in 1991. I saw it first on video, and it quickly became one of my favorite Disney movies. It was Disney's first musical to be converted to a Broadway format, and I further fell in love with the tweaks to the plot and the additional songs. So I was especially excited when I found out that they were making a movie live action remake of it.

I am happy to report that the new version is every bit as amazing as the original Disney movie, even making the occasional reference to Jean Cocteau's 1946 movie:

The new movie also answered plenty of questions that the 1991 version raised. I was wondering about some of them, and others hadn't occurred to me:

• What happened to Belle's mother?
• Why did Maurice and Belle move to "this poor provincial town"?
• What is the name of this poor provincial town?
• Where did they live prior to that?
• Does Belle invent anything?
• Does Gaston have any other reasons for wanting Belle, aside from her beauty?
• Is LeFou the least bit concerned about Gaston's villainy?
• Did any villagers besides Belle object to Gaston's war march against the Beast?
• What was Gaston's occupation prior to the events of our story?
• Were ALL of the Prince's servants turned into objects?
• Was everyone in the castle at the time of the spell either the Prince or one of his servants?
• What was the dog's name (who was turned into a footstool)? Who were her owners?
• What happened to Mr. Potts?
• How did the Prince get so cruel that the enchantress has to take such extreme measures to teach him a lesson?
• What about the Prince's parents?
• What happens to the enchantress after she casts the spell?
• How does Belle get the heavy Beast onto Philippe after he's been wounded by the wolves?
• Why do the Beast's servants care so much for him? Do they blame themselves at all for the Beast's condition?
• Are all of the books in the Beast's library in English (or French)?
• How does a moment last forever?
• What is Cogsworth's first name?
• Does M. D'Arque have children? (This is not actually answered.)
• Was Gandalf ever transformed into a clock?
• Did Gandalf ever meet Hermione Granger?
• Did Obi-Wan enlighten anyone who didn't have "Skywalker" in their name? (Pun intended)
• For that matter, did Obi-Wan ever meet Hermione Granger?

• How does it look to have a snowball, dishes, rubble, mud, rubble and a falling villain thrown at you? (This is answered in the 3D version.)

• Could there be more to the poor than meets the eye? Maybe they deserve more respect than we often give them? Are they sometimes the best of us?
• Is everyone's hero necessarily heroic? What happens when our heroes disappoint us?
• Both the Prince and Gaston start out as spoiled, selfish and unkind. How can their repentance or lack thereof inspire us to become kinder and unselfish?

• What happens when the theater is almost empty because most people think there's nothing left to see, and Josh Groban starts singing your big brother's favorite song in the movie, and said big brother likes to sing, and is sitting next to you? (Hint: Josh Groban is suddenly a background singer.)

Beauty and the Beast is an amazingly well-done remake. Pro tip: stay to the end of the credits. There is no post-credits scene, but they save Josh Groban for last.

Overblown Controversy

Following are two recent posts that I shared on Facebook considering the controversy surrounding the announcement that LeFou is gay in the new remake of Beauty and the Beast.

For me, the most heartbreaking part of the furor over the rumors surrounding the upcoming Beauty and the Beast remake is Christians abandoning one of the most basic tenets of Christianity, to love your neighbor as yourself. It doesn't take more than a few clicks to discover that the rumors are way overblown, and more or less on par with the original animated movie. You know, the family-friendly movie you loved where LeFou is head over heels for Gaston, and (it sounds like this is reproduced in the new version) the wardrobe cross-dresses men in the battle. I've seen some people pledging to watch this movie as an alternative:

Expressing overblown contempt for something so minor goes against what Jesus taught, and is more on par with the actions of the Pharisees that He fought so hard against.

LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF. When asked who our neighbor was, Jesus used an example of a Samaritan, one of the groups most hated by the people He was teaching.

I'm not saying you need to go see Beauty and the Beast. Go or don't go. But if you refuse to watch it, don't tell people about the evils you think it contains that it doesn't.

As Christians, we are supposed to be a light to a dark, lost world. Instead, we're chasing away the people who need Jesus most because they disgust us. This is exactly what the Pharisees did. Jesus hung out and associated with these people. How many people that Jesus died for will spend eternity in torment because we chased them away by our scornful attitude?

****

I later realized that the recent overreactions and increasingly fantastical rumors about Beauty and the Beast are exactly what Gaston does in the story. He makes up a bunch of lies based on one bit of information and his fears, and stirs up vicious, destructive rage among the people of the village.

This is is an excellent blog post from someone who saw a preview of the new movie. She addresses the controversy and goes more in depth into the scenes referenced in the announcement.

Proposed Laws of Nature

Have you ever wished you could lobby for a new law of nature? Not just a legal law that can be broken, but a natural law that is impossible to break. Things like the laws of gravity (though, granted, I propose exceptions to that below) and physics. I've been pondering this lately, and these are my proposals so far:

• Snow may fall and ice may form anywhere except on roads, driveways, sidewalks and vehicles.
• Rain must cut it out before floods accumulate. If it must continue to rain at that point, the rain must relocate to locations more in need of water.
• Natural disasters must confine themselves to locations uninhabited by people or animals. I would suggest Mars.
• Hailstones must be no larger than your average pea.
• Tsunamis must always crash out to sea, never inland. If there are boats or surfers in the proposed path, the tsunami must wait until they are out of the way.
• There needs to be a limit on how thick fog can get. I would suggest a minimum visibility of 75 feet.
• Wind must be considerate and not destructive.
• Clouds must block the sun over the horizon at sunrise and sunset, at least during March and September.
• Skin must be unburnable.
• Wounds and maladies of all sorts must heal as fast as they do for Wolverine. However, replacing bones with adamantium would not be necessary.
• Vision may diminish to a point where glasses are needed for minor correction, but it must never progress to the point of blindness. The other senses must never diminish.
• Teleportation and human flight must be achievable and normal modes of transportation.
• Food, water and coffee must always be available to those who need them.
• Smoke and exhaust must be odorless and harmless.
• Fire must not stray from its intended location, provided it is intended for use in cooking, keeping warm, and campfires (and other beneficial uses, as needed). If set with malicious intent, it must be impossible to set.
• Meteors must avoid crashing on planets and spacecraft.
• The Northern and Southern Lights must be visible to more of Earth, more often. When forecast, it must be visible. It is all right for it to be somewhat rare, though, as that would preserve the novelty. Just less rare than it currently is.
• Science, healthcare, sports and the arts must always be held in high regard, and never repressed or under funded. They must be easily affordable both to provide and to patronize.
• Food must always be beneficial to a person's health. An excess of food must not lead to an excess of weight.
• Pimples must disappear, never to return, the instant a person turns 16.
• Back orders on products, especially if they are essential, must be impossible. 

Romans 13 and Civil Disobedience

I've heard several people cite the following verses to say we shouldn't be criticizing Trump:

Romans 13:1-2
Let every person be subject to governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those instituted by God. Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment.

What if those governing authorities are clearly sinning and commanding others to sin?

What if, say, God commanded Moses to tell Pharaoh to stop enslaving the Israelites and release them? (Exodus 3-12)

What if God commanded Samuel to criticize King Saul multiple times, and at times Samuel had to carry out the orders that God had commanded Saul to do, because Saul refused? (1 Samuel, 1 Chronicles)

What if God commanded Nathan to tell King David that having an affair and committing murder were terrible sins, leading to a very eloquent prayer of repentance? (2 Samuel 11-12, Psalm 51)

What if God commanded Elijah to prove to Queen Jezebel and the prophets of Baal that their idolatry was evil, causing Elijah to run for his life? (1 Kings 18)

What if God commanded Jeremiah to send a messenger to King Jehoiakim with a scroll full of the King's evil deeds, and Jehoiakim cut up the scroll and threw it in the fire, leading to God sending their kingdom into captivity? (Jeremiah 36)

What if God commanded Esther to talk to King Xerxes to inform him that the order he had rubber stamped to stamp out an entire people group was evil and murderous? (The book of Esther)

What if God commanded Jonah to tell the King of Nineveh that they were evil and destined for destruction - and God had to use extreme measures to get Jonah to obey and criticize the governing authorities? (The book of Jonah)

What if Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego engaged in civil disobedience by refusing to bow to the statue of King Nebuchadnezzar, and were thrown into a blazing furnace for it, but miraculously survived? (Daniel 3)

What if Daniel had to tell King Belshazzar that the mysterious writing that had just been written on the wall meant the following? "God has numbered the days of your reign and brought it to an end. ... You have been weighed on the scales and found wanting. ... Your kingdom is divided and given to the Medes and Persians." (Daniel 5:26‭-‬28) Belshazzar didn't survive the day.

What if Daniel directly defied orders to worship only King Darius, and got thrown into the lion's den, and miraculously survived? (Daniel 6)

What if Jesus - God in flesh - blasted the religious leaders for their hypocrisy, over and over and over? (The Gospels)

What if Peter and John told the governing authorities that they would not obey their command to stop spreading Jesus' message, saying, "Which is right in God’s eyes: to listen to you, or to him?" (Acts 4:19)

What if Stephen told the governing authorities that Jesus was right, they had murdered Jesus and Jesus had defeated death, causing them to stone him? (Acts 7)

What if Paul - who wrote Romans 13:1-2 - criticized the Roman authorities for breaking Roman law by beating him and Silas, leading to them apologizing? (Acts 16)

There are so many more examples, but those are the ones that come to mind. We are commanded to submit to authorities. We are commanded to pray for them. We are not commanded to refrain from criticism when they are wrong. Paul said to expose wrongdoing (Ephesians 5:11). Paul wrote Romans under the rule of the evil emperor Nero, known for his brutal treatment of Christians.

Now, what if many (though not all) of the people currently citing Romans 13 were some of President Obama's sharpest critics? What if they so recently defied what they themselves are now preaching? Is this hypocrisy not exactly what Jesus repeatedly accused the Pharisees of doing?

What if our current president claims to follow Christ, but claims never to have needed to repent of anything?

What if he repeatedly ordered his supporters to violently throw people out of his rallies while campaigning?

What if he has had multiple affairs and bragged about rape, later trying to pass it off as "bathroom talk"?

What if he openly mocked a man with special needs, and has repeatedly denied it despite video evidence to the contrary?

What if he has passed a temporary ban on thousands of people in mortal danger from fleeing to safety?

What if he is working to dismantle needed healthcare policies without first proposing a replacement?

What if he represses the freedoms of speech and of the press guaranteed in the First Amendment, by telling the media, National Parks, scientists and others to shut up?

What if he fired the acting Attorney General because she chose to follow the orders in the Constitution rather than the President?

What if he has inspired (intentionally or not) violent acts of racism, sexism, Islamophobia, Christophobia, homophobia, xenophobia, and several other phobias, throughout the US and even as far away as Quebec?

Again, there are so many more examples of how this man has been "weighed in the scales and been found wanting."

---

So what are we to do?

We are to respect the office of President.

We are to submit and obey what he tells us to do, provided that doing so would not go against the commands in the Bible and the Constitution.

We are to be upright, following God first, then the law, then the president.

We are to fight for the less fortunate.

We are to stay informed and fact check what we hear. Let's not automatically support or oppose what we hear based solely on the fact that Trump said or did it.

We are to pray fervently that God will give wisdom to President Trump, and lead him to repentance. We need to pray that Trump will become the wise and compassionate president that we need.

We are to hold out hope and not despair.

We are to remember that God is bigger and greater than Trump, and God will prevail.

Snoke Theories, Episode III

"I am a Jedi, like my father before me."

He was separated at birth from his sister, who he didn't even know he had, and raised by an aunt and uncle who struggled to keep their moisture farm afloat in a sea of sand, while dealing with a moody and whiny teenager who would rather be getting power converters at Tosche Station. The area was plagued with murderous sand people (who he is likely unaware that their compatriots killed his grandmother), Jawas with dubious motivation, and slug-like gangster Hutts. Oh, and let's not forget Greedo, who may or may not have shot first.

He came upon a droid on a mission, with a message from the sister he didn't know he had. This led him to find out that his whole life was a lie, the old man he thought was just a lonely old hermit was actually a famous Jedi who had fought in the legendary Clone Wars, his farm would be decimated, he had a twin sister with a much cooler title, and his father was the very person the old hermit told him killed his father. The man he had always admired and wished he'd known. Talk about disillusionment! 

At first, he trained hard to fight the evil that brought his father to a fraction of the man he had once been. But after triumphing over the Sith and actually losing his father in the process, his new role of training a new generation of Jedi ended in disaster, with his own nephew going on a murdering rampage. Like Yoda and Obi-Wan before him, Luke went into hiding. The years passed, and Luke waited on a far away island on a lonely planet.

Or did he?

What if all the tragedy in his life led him on a darker path than we realized? What if he became a dark lord himself? He once said he was a Jedi like his father before him. What if he decided to become a Sith like his father before him as well? Maybe one who would continue his instruction of his nephew in the ways of the Force. But now in holographic form, from a distance. The giant hologram would add to his air of mystery, and he could instruct people all over the galaxy from the comfort of his throne on a remote island.

But wait, you say. He doesn't look like Snoke! Ah, but he has had years to figure out and study the ways of the Force. Who knows how much the Force can do? I'm sure the movies don't even scratch the surface. Maybe people with enough midichlorians can change their appearance at will.

You may object that we see Luke and Snoke in two different places. First of all, he isn't actually present in the room where he talks to Kylo Ren and Hux. He is there in holographic form. Secondly, in the prequels, we get to know Senator Palpatine pretending to fight for good, and we also see Darth Sidious guiding the bad guys in the dark side of the Force. They don't reveal until later that they are the same person. Maybe this is another case of that. Perhaps they will reveal that Luke and Snoke are the same person.

Lastly, both names are one syllable and end with "ke"... Highly suspicious.

Snoke Theories, Episode II

"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine."

He watched his protégé and best friend, whom he loved like a brother, slowly turn bad. He fought his friend through lava flows that would burn away said friend's limbs and severely maim him in other ways, causing him to need a mask to breathe. I ask you, is this the action of a friend?

Then, Anakin out of the way for the moment, he contrived to separate Anakin's children and not tell his "dear friend" the joyful news that he was a father. He would spend the next few years as a hermit on a desolate island, only starting to be helpful when Anakin's daughter asked for help, and Anakin's son came to him with a droid with a message. Then he handed the whiny brat of a Luke a deadly weapon before telling him what it was. What if Luke had pressed the wrong button with the lightsaber pointed at himself? When that scheme didn't work, he made up some harebrained story about Darth Vader killing Luke's father - which he would later explain away by claiming it was true "from a certain point of view." Whatever.

Then, next time he saw old Anakin, he declared pompously, "If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine." So, always willing to help a friend, Anakin took Obi-Wan's advice.

Like Yoda, Obi-Wan just disappeared. Like Yoda, I didn't see a body. Did he die? Like Yoda, he would show up later as a force ghost. He spoke in a creepy voice to Luke telling him to use the force. But were his actions as a ghost particularly powerful? Unless you consider spooky apparitions and voices powerful, not especially.

The last we see him as Obi-Wan, he is a holographic ghost smiling at the pawn he trained to defeat his old friend.

Fast forward about 30 years. A new generation has arisen, and now we see a powerful holographic ghost who is commanding his friend's grandson to commit horrible atrocities.

I rest my case.

Snoke Theories, Episode I

"When 930 years old you reach, be as good you will not."

He has lived his very long life as a small being. He grew up green, with big ears. Though he didn't make a big deal of it that we know of, there is a hint that he was self conscious of his tiny stature:

"Judge me by my size, do you?"

"Size matters not."

It sounds to me like he was trying to convince himself.

The last time we see Yoda, he is lying in bed, dying. But is he dying? He just disappears. I didn't see a body. Oh sure, he shows up later as a force ghost. That just proves that he isn't completely gone. He has become another kind of being. Transparent, but visible to Luke.

Fast forward about 30 years. A new leader has risen. He is holographic and huge. (Remember, Yoda was holographic and tiny last we saw him.) He is transparent at times, and visible to Luke's nephew. Snoke is just as bald as Yoda, but he does not look as good. Clearly, he has aged in that time. His study of the Force has clearly taught him to overcome his tiny size and long poiny ears. He is now HUGE! Even seated, he towers over his underlings. Perhaps it's the memory of Darth Vader that turned him bad and made him talk forward. Or maybe it's the influence of General Hux (who looks suspiciously like Bill Weasley ... coincidence? I think not.) and/or Kylo Ren. Snoke seems to be just as respected by the First Order as Yoda was by the Jedi.

Yep. Supreme Leader Snoke is clearly Yoda.

Snoke Theories: Prologue

Supreme Leader Snoke has been the subject of numerous wild theories regarding his identity. Some believe he is Darth Plagueis, the infamous Sith legend. (This has been denied by the powers that be.) Some say he is the youngling who talked to Anakin Skywalker before Anakin slaughtered everyone in the room. Some even say he is Darth Vader or Jar Jar Binks.

These, of course, are ridiculous.

I was watching Star Wars: The Force Awakens the other day and came up with some brilliant theories of my own. I feel confident that one of my theories is accurate. Time will tell which one it is. The next few blog posts will detail who I think Snoke is.

Lessons from Social Media

I wrote most of these back in June of this year and posted them as Facebook statuses. I now present them in blog form. I even memed a few and added some bonus lessons not seen previously.

***

Bacon and coffee are essential to your continued survival, and must be photographed, memed, and otherwise shared with utmost respect and awe. Then eaten and drunk.

LOL also stands for "lots of love." (No it doesn't.)

The world must be alerted when you have "the feels."

All pictures of cats, dogs and velociraptors must be shared.

Any fact check can begin and end with Snopes or Wikipedia. Or The Daily Currant.

All members of the political party you oppose are the Devil incarnate.

The latest death in Game of Thrones, Doctor Who, or any other show you enjoy, is an international tragedy. That also goes for books, such as Harry Potter.

If you do not share this status, either you are completely heartless, or you are ashamed of Jesus and He will deny you before the Father. Or both.

It is absolutely necessary to video yourself singing "Let It Go" and share it with the world. Extra credit if it goes viral enough for Disney to take notice and block the video for copyright infringement.

The Onion, The Daily Currant, The Duffel Blog and other satire websites are reputable sources of news. Definitely take them seriously.

"I disagree with you" = "I hate you and your kind."

Love = complete agreement and approval

If you disagree with someone, it is absolutely necessary to hurl profanity-laced insults at them. Because random strangers appreciate being called every name unfit to be printed in the book?

Everyone you feel is wrong with the world must be informed of their "wrong with the world" status.

Did someone say something that unintentionally hurt your feelings? They absolutely aimed it at you and meant it as a personal and public insult. This person must be taught a sharp lesson by being unfriended, and for extra credit, blocked. This will automatically convert them to your way of thinking. But you won't know it because you blocked them. Alternatively, you can unfriend them and send them a PM explaining what a lowlife they are.

Doctor Who has a quote for everything. If Doctor Who does not have a quote for it, make up a quote and put it on a picture of The Doctor.

Feel strongly about something? Post a status instructing everyone who disagrees with you to unfriend you now.

Every trip to the gym must be carefully documented and shared for the world to see. (Note: while these can get annoying, I have found that when I do share it, it helps keep me accountable. So don't get after people too much for this. They need encouragement, not "cease and desist" notices.)

If all else fails, put your profound (or not-so-profound) idea in a meme. Extra credit: attribute your idea to Einstein. Or Lincoln. Or a Minion.

Always be yourself, unless you can be anyone or anything else, real or fictional. Then be anyone or anything else, real or fictional.

You can combat negativity by posting pictures of superheroes, cartoon characters, or other positive subjects.

Everyone knows the key to fixing the world's problems, and everyone else is clueless and must be told how.

You can't draw worth beans? No problem. Just draw an ugly face and use it to troll others. It will go viral and your poor excuse for a drawing will gain memingful immortality. (Like the word I just made up?)

When God (who is apparently an old man with a long white beard), who makes no mistakes, created every single person in the world, He stood at a table with a beaker, and added a dose of this, a dose of that, and... oops! The perfect God who doesn't make mistakes accidentally spilled His entire supply of a third ingredient into the potion!

It is absolutely necessary to know which character of every show in existence you are.

You will be SHOCKED OUT OF YOUR SENSES what happens when you click on this clickbaity link!

He used clickbait, and THIS happened! LOL!

Minions are surprisingly philosophical.

Always photograph what you are eating.

Memes count as news, and they are definitely accurate.

Anything at all (with the possible exception of Fifty Shades of Grey) is still a better love story than Twilight.

The Doctor must under no circumstances be called Doctor Who. That is not his name. Never mind that's how he was credited until recently, and he was often called Doctor Who in the classic series.

Never mind what Back to the Future says about Marty McFly coming to the future on October 21, 2015. That day is TODAY. In fact, it's been many days since at least 2012.

#Always #use #hashtags. Better yet, ‪#‎overuse‬ ‪#‎hashtags.

If anyone wishes you "Happy Holidays," they are part of a dastardly scheme to take Christ out of Christmas and must be chastised accordingly. Anything less than "Merry Christmas" must be greeted with Scrooge-like anger.

If anyone dares mention Christmas before Thanksgiving, they must be publicly chastised for their crimes against humanity.

Clickbait and Adbait

Public Service Announcement: The following words and phrases may actually make me LESS likely to click on your link:

• This will blow your mind
• What happened next? 
• I gasped.
• I'm SPEECHLESS
• actually, almost anything in ALL CAPS
• Lots of exclamation points!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Shocking
• Spread this absolutely everywhere! 
• vague comments like "he said THIS" or "THIS happened"
• using pronouns rather than specifying the person 
• Like if...
• Share if...
• Retweet/Re-post/Reblog if...
• One like/share = one prayer
• Like = ________, Comment =_______, Share = ________
• Like to show respect
• anything that tries to guilt me into clicking, liking or sharing
• Jesus says that if you deny me before men, I will deny you before God
• anything implying I am heartless if I don't click, like, comment or share
• Share this in 30 seconds or something terrible will happen
• Sadly, only 12% will share this. It should be 100%.
• anything that definitively predicts the public's reaction to this post, stating specific percentages
• This weird trick
• #25 made me react strongly (fall over laughing, pee my pants, throw something out the window, etc.)
• Excessive foul language
• Bad grammar or spelling
• anything that counts the number of words someone used to make their point
• Watch this person SHUT DOWN their political opponent
• This person sent their political opponent packing, or did anything else to defeat them (the article or video in question is often about someone making a comment that expressed disagreement, but in no way sent anyone packing, and is sometimes not even true)
• Is there room for me on your wall? (accompanied by a picture of Jesus)

If I do click on your link, the following might cause me to leave the page quickly:

• Constantly having to click "next"
• Excessive ads, especially if I can't scroll without accidentally clicking on one
• Deceptive ads that have arrows that look like a "next" button
• Ads that completely cover the screen, blocking what I'm trying to read
• Ads with videos that auto play
• Music on your web page that auto plays (even if there are no ads)
• Pages that force me to watch a video (usually an ad) before allowing me to progress to what is on the page

Note: I have nothing against ads, per se (after all, I have ads on this blog), but I do have a problem with people abusing them.

Tom Jamieson

Following is the eulogy I wrote for my uncle Tom, who passed away of a heart attack last month. His sisters and my aunt helped me with some of the details. A shorter version was printed in the program, but this is the full eulogy. 

Tom Jamieson was born to John and Helen Irene Jamieson on June 24, 1955 in Omaha, Nebraska. He attended grade school at St. Cecilia's, followed by high school at Creighton Prep. His dad died when he was 12. Tom got a scholarship when he started high school, and he worked his way through to pay tuition. After graduating high school in 1973, he attended the University of Nebraska Omaha for about a year and got a job at the Nebraska Psychiatric Institute. He got married and moved to Seattle in 1977. That marriage only lasted about three years, but his move would start a new chapter in his life.

He worked at Doctor's Hospital in Seattle, which would merge with Swedish. It was there that he met a beautiful young woman. The third time they randomly ran into each other, he joked, "If we don't stop meeting like this, we're going to have to get married." They must have kept meeting like that, because Tom started dating Lois in 1981. They were married in 1984, and their daughter Darcy came along five years later.

After working at Swedish, Tom worked 11 years at Washington Natural Gas, followed by 14 years at Microsoft.

In recent years, he has been active in politics, and he has visited the City Council regularly (much to the chagrin of some of his political opponents). He was the Republican Chair of Washington State's 32nd District, and a Precinct Committee Officer.

Tom and Lois cared for Lois' father Ken Loge until his death in May 2015. Inspired by his father-in-law, Tom started walking regularly, up to six miles a day. Tom and Lois spent what they could not know would be their last summer together walking, going on bike rides, and even sailing on the whale boat where Darcy works.

Tom loved chess, and he won a championship at the age of 16. He was talented in several areas of art. He loved to draw, and he taught himself to play the piano. As a political activist, he made several cartoon videos to illustrate his points.

He was a deep thinker, and was proud of his membership in Mensa, for people with high IQs. He was an excellent writer and researcher, and was always eager to learn more. He had a quick wit and a caring heart.

Following a massive heart attack and a week in the hospital, Tom passed away peacefully. He is survived by his wife Lois and daughter Darcy, his siblings Holly, John, Mary and Kate, and 40 nieces, nephews, great nieces and great nephews. He is preceded in death by his parents and his brother Bill.

Kenneth L. Loge

Following is the eulogy I read at my grandpa's memorial service on Saturday, May 23, 2015 at United Evangelical Free Church in Seattle. It was broken into three segments with other speakers [indicated in square brackets] in between each segment.

***

Ken Loge was born in 1915 and raised on a farm in Cooperstown, North Dakota, the oldest of five boys. He gave his life to Christ at the age of 10 at a summer camp, and as he liked to put it, God gave him a very long and interesting life. After graduating from high school, he became a teacher in a one-room schoolhouse and fell in love with a beautiful woman named Marian.

Then came the draft. He found himself on the way to bootcamp in Louisiana, and it wasn't until later, when he was stationed in Boise, Idaho, that his bride Marian was able to take a train out and they were married in a small ceremony by a pastor they had only just met, witnessed by the pastor's wife and some new neighbors. It was Valentine’s Day 1942. Marian returned home, while Ken went on to serve in New Caledonia, an island off the Australian coast. Thanks to his clerical skills, he was pulled to office duty while the rest of his platoon was sent to Guadalcanal, where most of them were killed in combat. Between that and the Battle of the Coral Sea keeping the Japanese away from their base in New Caledonia, God clearly protected him for a very long and interesting life. He was later reassigned to France and Germany, and he would ride through Paris on a tank, surrounded by jubilant crowds celebrating the Allied Forces’ victory.

Following the war, he returned to the US, where he got a job in the circulation department of the Fargo Forum in Fargo, North Dakota. After two years there, he accepted an offer for a position as circulation manager at the Watertown Public Opinion in South Dakota. Later he would accept a new position as the pastor at a church in Brooks, Alberta, followed by another church in Wainwright, Alberta. Big Timber, Montana followed, and then Salmon Arm, British Columbia. While pastoring in BC, Ken was on the founding board of a new endeavor that they called Trinity Junior College. It would eventually become known as Trinity Western University.

[Here, Inga Warnock of Trinity Western University spoke on Grandpa's legacy at TWU.]

Throughout Ken’s careers at the newspaper and as pastor, he and Marian had five children: two daughters, a son, and two more daughters.

After their ministry was completed in BC, the family moved to Stevensville, Montana, where Ken became pastor. It was during this time that their daughter Linda got a teaching job in Hamilton, Montana, and a student in her class required the special ed expertise of a certain Mr. Sauke. But that’s another story. It was also while they were there that, a few years later, his son Robert was killed in a traffic accident, leaving two young children, Tracy and Jeff.

After Stevensville, God called Ken into a new ministry, and he became administrator of the brand new nursing home that would become known as Kah Tai Care Center in Port Townsend, Washington. He and Marian ministered there alongside George and Virginia Foutz, whose son currently attends United. It was also during this time that they would visit their daughter and son-in-law in Hong Kong, and later in the Philippines. One of my earliest memories is walking with my grandpa Loge to the school where my dad taught and my big brother Tim attended.

Ken’s upbringing and various ministries gave him a passion for reaching the lost for Christ. After retiring from the nursing home, he moved to Ancora Village in Everett, where the Loges, along with Lyle and Florence Vanderpoel, were among the first tenants. While there, Ken became a missions consultant with the Evangelical Free Church Mission, coordinating missionary visits to the churches in the Pacific Northwest and Northern Mountain Districts, in addition to other responsibilities. He was a vital part of the ministries of missionaries around the world.

[Here, Bob Verme, missionary to Japan, spoke on Grandpa's legacy overseas.]

Ken had a vital part in the founding of the Missionary Construction Teams, which has worked on many projects worldwide. During this time, Marian started declining in health, and she lost her battle to cancer in 1989. He was praying with her, and when it came her time to pray, she didn’t say anything. She was too busy singing with the angels. I remember the next morning, when my parents both came in my room to wake me up, half a world away, to tell me my beloved grandma was gone. They had waited until morning to tell me so that I would be able to sleep. That same year, I lost both grandmas, but God would provide two young cousins for Tim, Tracy, Jeff and me, and new granddaughters for my grandpa. Annika and Darcy could not have come at a more perfect time.

Following the loss of Marian, Ken once again visited the Philippines, Hong Kong and Japan. He would come back and report to the churches in the US on the ministries in Asia.

In 1991, we returned to the US, and in 1993, Andrèa joined us to complete the group of grandchildren. Along with my parents and Tim and me, Grandpa went to Hong Kong in the summer of 1994 to teach English, and he would continue to go back for a few summers after that. I was particularly amused that, as he made a practice of walking regularly, those of us who were younger had trouble keeping up with Grandpa as he speed walked down the streets of Hong Kong. While there, he impacted many youth for Christ, and his legacy lives on around the world.

In the following years, he would revisit Europe, where he saw it completely rebuilt from the rubble he had previously seen at the end of the War. He also visited Turkey, Thailand and China, in addition to traveling to Norway to meet relatives in his mother country.

In 2012, his son-in-law Tom accompanied him to Washington, DC, where Ken was honored in the Lone Eagle Honor Flight for his service in the War. This organization brings veterans to see the memorial there in memory of their service around the world. The Mariners would later honor the veterans from the Honor Flight at Safeco Field.

In 2013, he was honored at Trinity Western University for his role in its founding by having a dormitory named after him.

By this time, he was slowing down, but his passion for reaching people for Christ continued unabated. Last May he came to Activate, United’s youth group, and shared about how at the age of 10, he went forward at a summer camp and gave his life to Christ. Just last month, he wrote a letter to each member of Activate urging them to come to Christ if they haven’t already. A week before his death, he prayed passionately for anyone who does not have Christ.

May 9, our family sat vigil in his room. His pain was evident, and he was ready to go. He could hardly talk. We said our good byes, and I asked him to give Grandma a big hug from me. When Annika told him she loved him, he said, “I love you.” Those were the last words I understood from him. In the afternoon his niece Nola arrived. He opened his eyes and acknowledged her. Then he was gone. He was four months short of his 100th birthday.

In previous years, we cousins knew that if Grandpa was leaving the family get-together, we had to hurry to say our good byes. Someone would yell, “Grandpa’s leaving!” and his grandchildren came running. This time, nobody needed to yell. But Grandpa left. I can’t wait to see him again.

In addition to his wife Marian and his son Robert, he is also preceded in death by his parents Swen and Lisa, and four younger brothers, Maynard, Melvin, Truman and Spencer. Ken Loge is survived by four daughters, Linda, Bonnie, Lois and Dori, as well as seven grandchildren – Tim, Tracy, Jeff, Steven, Annika, Darcy and Andrèa – and five great-grandchildren: Austin, Taylor, Autumn, Ava and Katlyn.

Grief

My grandpa passed away on Saturday, May 9. I wrote the following a week later on May 16.

Grief is a funny thing. I sat with my family at my grandpa's bedside last Saturday and watched him struggle to breathe, struggle to talk. All I could understand was when he told my cousin Annika, "I love you." We all said good bye, and I had trouble getting out my request that he give my grandma a big hug. My mom's cousin arrived, and he acknowledged her presence, and then was gone. I knew it was coming, and I hoped it was a false alarm. But no pulse. I was OK for a few minutes, but then the tears came back. We made calls to family and to church.

Tuesday, I returned to work. One of my coworkers is Colombian, and I like practicing my Spanish with her. I thought maybe I wouldn't have too much trouble if I told her in Spanish. I was wrong. Tears.

I expected to be emotional at the viewing and graveside service yesterday (Friday). It was deeply moving. I stood in front of my hero's casket and looked at him. I liked how he had a bit of a smirk (which he did not have when he died... I'm not sure if that happened naturally when they closed his mouth, or what), and I rejoiced that he was finally free of his pain. He's in glory with my grandma in the presence of Jesus. Our family friend Mark Halstrom spoke eloquently at the grave site next to the flag-draped coffin. A soldier played Taps on the bugle, and then the soldiers folded the flag and presented it to my mom. It was an amazing, moving ceremony. But I was not expecting the lack of tears at the graveside. I've felt a mixture of pain, relief and joy that he is no longer suffering.

Then this morning, as I was pulling out of the driveway, I drove over a snail. I had tried to save its life by kicking it out of the way before leaving, but it wouldn't budge. I tried to avoid it, but the tire rolled over it and smushed it. That was more traumatic than it would have otherwise been.

Then, this evening, after not crying (much) for a few days, I noticed my grandpa's World War II Veteran hat sitting on the couch. And lost it. The flag pin on it is askew. I was always fixing that when he wore it. I was slightly baffled how I could stand in front of his body and not cry, but then lose it when I noticed his hat.

Grandpa, I miss you! See you soon!

Paul Heaven

It was 1991. We had just gotten back to the US from the Philippines, with plans to return in a year. In previous furloughs, we had lived on Washington State's Olympic Peninsula, but this time we would be east of the Puget Sound, attending United Evangelical Free Church in Seattle.

I remember the first social gathering we attended. I met the Heavens and the Beckmans, two couples who would grow to be great friends, and both couples would become important in my life. Along with several other youth, we walked from church to the nearby Westernco Donuts (they have amazing apple fritters). Having just returned from the tropical Philippines, I was freezing. It was July. My 13-year-old mind was wondering how many degrees below 0 it was, while everyone else was wearing t-shirts and shorts.

At that time, we had weekly potlucks at church. Paul and Cathy Heaven had a great sense of humor, and they would bring angeled eggs to the potlucks on occasion. After all, if your name is Heaven, why would you think of bringing deviled eggs?

That summer, we had a church campout north of Seattle, and one day we went for a hike up Sauk Mountain. As we approached the trailhead from the parking lot, we encountered a sign-in sheet, and we signed in. We had a good laugh as the previous group had signed "The Heavenly Host"...and here we were with the Heavens! (When we got to the top, we got to introduce the Heavens to the Heavenly Host.) Sometime earlier, a minor landslide had taken out parts of the path up the hill, and consequently, parts of the switch-back path were narrower than the rest. With my fear of heights, I was terrified as we went over those parts. It was Paul who took my hand each time we reached a narrow part and got me across. I don't know how I would have made it up the hill without him there to help. That increased my respect for him, and when we got back home, I made some blackberry jam to thank him. (It was blackberry season, and as we didn't have blackberries in the Philippines, I made the most of it.)

Paul went out of his way to spend time with me, and he had a great ministry. At a time when I was known by my peers at school for not going to the cinema, he took me to my first cinematic movie. 101 Dalmatians was being re-released, and it was the first movie I ever saw in a regular theater.

As 1992 came along, they started expecting their first child. It was an exciting time, and near the end of the year, little Ethan was born. Cathy taught me how to hold him, and Ethan was the first baby I held properly. It was a very memorable day.

Though we ended up not returning to the Philippines as we were planning, Paul and Cathy and Ethan had to move on. We kept in touch off and on, and we heard about more kids joining their "Heavenly host." I have yet to meet their other kids (who are mostly grown by now), but maybe I will someday.

Years later, we got word that Paul had come down with cancer. They caught it, but it came back. After months of struggles, I got word this morning that my dear friend slipped into the presence of his Savior.

I am so grateful to Paul and Cathy for reaching out to me (literally at times) and loving a missionary kid who felt more at home in the Philippines. That they would take time to get to know me, just to hang out at times, and to help in other ways as well, spoke volumes. They were instrumental in my transition to 8th grade and high school in the US, and if not for them, I would not be who I am today. I only hope I can be as caring and helpful to others as they were to me.

Thank you, Paul. I look forward to seeing you in Heaven.

Now please excuse me while I go cry...

Cathy has done a great job of keeping people updated here. Check it out for more on these amazing people.