Wednesday, April 26, 2017

False Musical Plots

My craziness has struck again. This time I decided to come up with musicals, using their actual titles, but summarize the plots completely wrong. Enjoy!

About a bunch of candles that have just had their wicks installed. They have been wicked.

The Phantom of the Opera
The sad tale of Banquo's ghost in an opera version of the Scottish Play

Inspired by Big, but he gets much, MUUUCCHHHH bigger!

About a rip in time and space... It is rent in twain!

Sister Act
A remake of White Christmas, focusing on the Haynes Sisters

Beauty and the Beast
A mysterious deformed creature haunts an opera house and trains a beautiful diva to sing

A Very Potter Musical
The Brady Bunch learns to make pots

Something Rotten
A musical about cleaning out the fridge at work

All the actors completely ignore the director, drawing a metaphorical parallel to herding cats

People get ill from eating a ton of ham

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
About a factory that churns out merchandise for the hit band "Charlie and the Chocolate"

About a failed attempt at turning Star Trek into a musical. It was named with a mouth full of food. The person tried to say "Star Trek", but it came out all garbled.

The Buddy Holly Story
Two holly bushes become best friends

Once on This Island
Captain Jack Sparrow remembers the last time he was left marooned on this island. There was more rum at the time.

An elf moves to the Shire and revolutionizes the hobbits' gardens, songs and culture

The Lord of the Rings from Peregrin Took's perspective

Young Frankenstein
A teenager learns honesty while drinking from a stein

Miss Saigon
Someone moves across the world from Vietnam and feels homesick. They really miss Saigon!

A boy is stuck in something, but what is the lad in? You don't find out until the end.

Where you are once you get downtown: you're in town.

A Spanish musical about avoidance

Sunset Boulevard
A musical about a road that is stuck in a time loop at sunset

Mamma Mia!
Super Mario Bros, the Musical!

The Drowsy Chaperone
An elementary field trip goes wrong when the overworked and underpaid parent who comes along falls asleep

The ultimate war against junk mail. Canned meat gets thrown across the stage.

The Civil War
A polite disagreement among gentlemen

Man of La Mancha
A Spanish man applies to Starbucks and specializes in making macchiatos​. (Mancha and macchiato literally mean "stain" in Spanish and Italian, respectively.)

The Wizard of Oz
After an exemplary career at Hogwarts, the potions master retires to sell potions by the ounce.

That time of the day when things get so dirty that simple tissues won't do.

Into the Woods
A sequel of Legally Blonde, where the main character is a huge fan of Elle Woods

Set in the desert, where there are lots and lots of camels

My Fair Lady
The sad tale of Sansa Stark and her ill-fated direwolf

Bat Boy
In an attempt to sound cooler and more menacing, Robin rebrands himself

The King & I
The life and times of Priscilla Presley

State Fair
Iowa is rated as simply fair. Not great, not horrible, just fair.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Josh Groban's dog must be exorcised when he starts biting off people's hair

A mad scientist invents an aerosol can that sprays hair everywhere.

The sad tale of an Australian swagman who stole a jumbuck and jumped in a billabong rather than be arrested. It involves a fair amount of waltzing.

The Slipper and the Rose
"Rose Tyler, I - "

The entire cast gets blown across the stage by a strong wind

Travelers at the airport are constantly losing their baggage because the baggage claim carousel isn't working right

The third task of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, extended into a full length musical

An amateur gardener calls in the professionals to groom his olive tree

The Scarlet Pimpernel
A star-crossed lover picks the perfect red flower for his beloved girlfriend

Love Never Dies
An appropriately-named musical in which the lovers truly love each other, are utterly faithful to each other, and they both survive. In fact, they are vampires, so they are immortal.

Annie Get Your Gun
Annie must take extreme measures to protect herself from the ongoing threat of Miss Hannigan, Rooster, and their devious schemes to find Easy Street

About a serial murderer who can't spell right

All about Annie Oakley and her sharpshooting skills

Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat
A futuristic story of an innovative young lad who invents a coat that can project movies

Hello Dolly!
Dolly keeps missing the painfully obvious. I mean, hello!!

Groundhog Day
Old Ivy finally defeats the Chipmunks, and the mayor declares a holiday to celebrate. J. Pierrepont Finch gives a speech (sung, of course) at the ceremony.

Addams Family
Belle meets her future in-laws

Jersey Boys
A group of football players campaigns to replace their old outdated jerseys

The Falsettos
The show must go on, despite all the sopranos and altos having various unavoidable conflicts to the choral concert. The tenors and basses must cover for them.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Musicals Minus a Letter

One letter can make a big difference! A group I am in challenged us to come up with names of musicals, but take out a letter, and then explain the plot of this new musical. I had fun with this and came up with a bunch. I may be adding more as I think of them.

Lord of the Rigs
A hobbit trucker must take a semi to Mount Doom and destroy it (kind of a "Lord of the Rings meets Mad Max")

The Irate Queen
The Queen is not amused.

Unset Boulevard
An aging and crazed star of yesteryear must now remove the dishes, silverware and napkins that she carefully arranged on the street. Quick before that Cadillac drives over them! It does not end well for the driver of the Cadillac.

Little Hop of Horrors
Crazed bunnies resolve to "eat Cleveland and Des Moines and Peoria and..."

Spiderman: Turn of the Dark
The Dark Side takes a whole new form, turning to new forms of evil.

The first lady of Argentina celebrates life.

The Pantom of the Opera
An opera singer goes mute and must now mime their part.

The Hunchback of Note Dame
A hunchback gets dating advice and must take notes.

Le Mis
One person is very miserable.

Ear Evan Hansen
Evan gets an ear transplant.

In a massive hailstorm, a whole ton of hail falls.

Beauty and the East
A beautiful maiden encounters ugliness and love out east.

Beauty and the Beat
Belle plays the drums.

The Little Mermad
Ariel is not amused.

Gollum joins the media and brings the newses to all those nasty hobbitses.

Tim has fallen on hard times.

Hell Dolly
Dolly is not amused.

Finding NeverLAN
The epic search for that place where there are no computer networks.

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Tying
You can win or lose, but a tie is not an option.

A rags to riches story of a young maiden who loves apple cider and meets a prince

Gus and Dolls
The theatre cat finds a new hobby in his retirement.

Bye Bye Birde
Everyone says good bye to their favorite bird before it flies south for the winter.

A Yea with Frog and Toad
Frog and Toad win the election.

The Music Ma
A proud mother helps her musical child to greatness.

The Iz
The life story of Israel Kamakawaiwo'ole.

Alexander's Ragtime Ban
A prohibition tale of when dancing was not allowed.

Mrs. Strauss travels back in time and meets an Egyptian prince. It does not end well for either of them, but "the gods love Titanic."

Into the Wood
Villagers band together to enter a tree.

A Very Otter Musical
Hermione's patronus learns to sing.

He-Man of La Mancha
A very macho man takes on the pesky windmills.

The Black Rook
The epic tale of a chess piece's quest to checkmate the enemy.

Catch Me if Yo Can
A hip hop musical about a rapper's escape from justice.

Mamma Mi
A mother is very excited about the third note on the solfege scale.

A group of girls finds stardom with the help of reams and reams of paper.

[tile of show]
About someone who lays tile.

[title of sow]
A pig goes from Ma'am to Mrs. to AA to BA to Doctor.

High School Música
A boy and girl meet at a fiesta in Cancún and find out they go to the same school in Oaxaca.

Ten Beach Movie
Like A Tale of Two Cities, but on ten beaches instead.

Little Omen
Starts with an ominous warning and goes on to tell the sinister story of four sisters.

A mad scientist brings a dead man back to life using spare body parts and electricity, but things go south quickly when the creature's foul, rank odor withers grass, causes trees to fall over, and local animals to keel over dead.

The Fros
Dionysus and his servant Xanthius encounter a sinister group of hippies with frizzy hair while questing to bring back a decent playwright.


You're a Good Man, Harlie Brown
The Peanuts gang learns to ride motorcycles.

Sow Boat
A boat sails up the Mississippi carrying a load of pigs.

Show Boa
The pigs on aforementioned bot got eaten by a snake.

A new concept introducing a malt shop at the local spa.

The Kin and I
Anna visits her family.

An iffy tale of chickens.

Flower Rum Song
Captain Jack Sparrow had a bit too much to drink.

A Christmas Tory
The family Christmas party gets a little too political.

Big Ish
It's kinda big, but not huge.

10 in the Shade
The dry winter when the Snowmaker visited.

The Secret Arden
About a town in Ontario that very few people know about.

About a gallant knight named Sam.

School of RCK
An Algerian soccer team trains its players.

Fiddler on the Roo
A joey learns to play the violin.

Bombay Reams
An aspiring Bollywood star struggles through reams of paperwork to reach his dream.

Ale of Two Cities
London and Paris compete for the best brew.

Wet Side Story
It's raining in New York.

A Christmas Carl
An updated version of the classic tale, in which Carl Scrooge is visited by three hosts.

A popular teenage show decides to promote compressed air. Everyone's electronics are cleaned.

A very hairy puppy visits the vet.

Wes Side Story
Wes joins the Jets.

One on this Island
The epic search for palm trees on islands.

Dr. Horrible's Singalong Bog
Dr. Horrible goes on a quest through marshy flea-infested bogs to reach the secret lair of the Evil League of Evil, singing the whole time.